¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*¹Î
2022-12-12 1706

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.

Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hiphop and rock genre.

The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Helen, 
Thank you for making an essay. Your sentences are good and meaningful.  However, you have to be more aware of your grammatical errors and pronunciation lapses as well as you need to be careful with appropriate word usage and some articles in your sentences. Keep improving.  ~ Teacher QUENNY.. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.
>> Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.(CORRECT) 
Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The sing er performed hiphop and rock genre.
>> Actually, I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. The last concert that I watched was when I went to the beer festival there were some famous singers invited to that festival to make people excited to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hip-hop and rock genres of music. 
The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.
>> The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better in playing bowling than me. But one day I won the game! So I was extremely delighted that I had beaten him playing the bowling game. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.

Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hiphop and rock genre.

The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122486 What bad habit you had a hard time overcoming before? ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 2
122485 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1810
122484 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 2863
122483 9/20 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1753
122482 Why is it important to understand how dinosaurs lived? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1359
122481 Talk about three ways you have fun at home. ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1807
122480 Is a concert better than a festival? Answer in a few sentences. ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1997
122479 Where can you find so many rocks? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 2839
122478 What do you like to do to relax during the weekend? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1971
122477 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1719
122476 How would you ask a stranger for help? ÃÖ*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1774
122475 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 3
122474 What was your dream job? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 2823
122473 The slender body. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 2238
122472 HOMEWORK: If something is annoying you, what do you usually do?... ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 2427
122471 What do you think will be the long term results of continuous... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1693
122470 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1
122469 Have you ever been outside your comfort zone? Please tell me a... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1737
122468 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1614
122467 homework ÇÏ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1573

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04