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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Why do you think it is so difficult for people to give up and quit smoking?

작성자: 황*하
2022-12-07 833

회원님의 영작문

I think that it is the best stress reliever compared to other ways such as drinking an alchool, doing exercise and so on. It is easy to do it and can also save time because it doesn't need much time. Few decade ago, we used to smoke everywhere, even in the bus, the subway and the class rooms too. Smokers complains a lot about the few places that allow smoking these days. It is because of the awareness of indirect smoking. There are a lot of reserch papers which warn the health problem due to the indirect smoking. However, it is really difficult to quit smoking because it contains nicotine that is similar to drugs. It is easy to be addicted to. That's the main reason why people can give up smoking. It addition, it is one of the bad habbit so people feel bored if there isn't anything to do. It can be the things to do, when we have free time. Sometimes, somking area is the popular place to hear important news from various people because they talk a lot there.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

I think that it is the best stress reliever compared to other ways such as drinking an alchool, doing exercise and so on. 
>> I think that it is the best stress reliever compared to other ways such as drinking an alcohol, doing exercise and so on. 
It is easy to do it and can also save time because it doesn't need much time. 
>> CORRECT! 
Few decade ago, we used to smoke everywhere, even in the bus, the subway and the class rooms too.
>> A few decades ago, we used to smoke everywhere, even in the bus, in the subway, and in the classrooms too.
Smokers complains a lot about the few places that allow smoking these days. 
>> Smokers complain a lot about the few places that allow smoking these days. 
It is because of the awareness of indirect smoking. 
>> CORRECT! 
OR >> It is because of second-hand smoking.
There are a lot of reserch papers which warn the health problem due to the indirect smoking. 
>> There are a lot of research papers which warn the health problem due to the indirect smoking. 
However, it is really difficult to quit smoking because it contains nicotine that is similar to drugs. 
>> CORRECT! 
It is easy to be addicted to. 
>> CORRECT! 
That's the main reason why people can give up smoking. 
>> That's the main reason why people cannot give up smoking. 
It addition, it is one of the bad habbit so people feel bored if there isn't anything to do. 
>> It addition, it is one of the bad habits so people feel bored if there isn't anything to do. 
It can be the things to do, when we have free time. 
>> It can be one of the things to do, when we have free time. 
Sometimes, somking area is the popular place to hear important news from various people because they talk a lot there.
>> Sometimes, smoking area is a popular place to hear important news from various people because they talk a lot there.

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