¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What computer games do you think is popular among people your age?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹®
2022-12-05 1083

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Computer games are important for teenagers because they consider as way to get along with friends. Actually, teenagers or 20s(male) usually go to PC room when they meet friends. Also, they become closer even though they are awkward. So, computer games that can play with multiple are popular. Furthermore, people in my age love competition games. There should be winner and loser. It stimulates their self-esteem, so they play games for over 5 hours to go higher and higher. No one want to get behind with their game ranks. That's why most games show people's ranking. At last, people usually do games to relieve their stress. They want to get out of the reality and find more sensational methods. When they shot a gun and attack someone, they feel cool and refresh. Also, they delude themselves as strong and powerful people. It leads people to buy expensive items. Especially, people usually love game youtuber who spend much money buying rare items.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for this Mary!

Computer games are important for teenagers because they consider as way to get along with friends. 
>>>   Computer games are important for teenagers because they consider it as a way to get along with friends. 
Actually, teenagers or 20s(male) usually go to PC room when they meet friends.
>>>  correct  
Also, they become closer even though they are awkward. 
>>>   correct  
So, computer games that can play with multiple are popular. 
>>>  So, computer games that can be played with multiple players are popular.  
Furthermore, people in my age love competition games. 
>>>   correct 
There should be winner and loser.
>>There should be a winner and a loser.  
It stimulates their self-esteem, so they play games for over 5 hours to go higher and higher. 
>>>   correct  
No one want to get behind with their game ranks. 
>>No one wants to be behind with their game ranks.   
That's why most games show people's ranking. 
>>>   correct  
At last, people usually do games to relieve their stress. 
>>>   correct  
They want to get out of the reality and find more sensational methods. 
>>>   correct  
When they shot a gun and attack someone, they feel cool and refresh. 
>>>   When they shot a gun and attack someone, they feel cool and refreshed.
Also, they delude themselves as strong and powerful people. 
>>>   correct   
It leads people to buy expensive items. 
>>>   correct   
Especially, people usually love game youtuber who spend much money buying rare items.
>>>  Especially, people usually love game youtubers who spend much money buying rare items. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
126455 It is often said that the rich are growing richer, and the poor... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-13 796
126454 3/10 ¼­*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-13 0
126453 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-13 0
126452 My childhood ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-13 2
126451 The laughing ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-13 1
126450 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-13 0
126449 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-13 1
126448 What do you think are the loopholes of the current workweek... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-13 1126
126447 3.13 homework ±Ç*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-03-13 980
126446 3/13 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-13 966
126445 06.Mar.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-13 1
126444 Monday ±Ç*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-13 1
126443 What are you doing this weekend? °û*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-12 628
126442 Home work. ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-03-12 764
126441 What are the most important features when determining someone\'s... ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-03-12 928
126440 What was the best advice you have given to someone? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-12 2
126439 Why do people attempt suicide? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-12 2
126438 Should chewing gums be prohibited/banned in your country? Why or... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-12 979
126437 If you had to lose one of your senses (sight, smell, hearing,... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-12 866
126436 Many people think that we learn from the past. Do you think... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-12 857

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04