¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is your first reaction to problems? Do you panic/ analyze it/ run to someone to talk and get he

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Àü*ä
2022-12-01 1572

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If I have some problems, First I try to avoid the panic state and get some rest.
I would one step back, Analyzing the problems and thinkink about the solutions.
Nevertheless, I couldn't have a solution I might talk to someone to get help.
It's not shameful behavior. I think, independent person is not that to slove all the problems myself.
Independent person know their situation exactly and they can ask for the help to someone easily.
It is more important to act to solve the problem.
It could be help to level up for me and I could get some good experience and skills.
Then I can solve another coming problems and even I can help someone.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Eun Chae!
Thank you so much for doing your homework every day.  In making sentences, make sure that you don't have two verbs together.  Use prepositions like "to" or a conjunction which is "and" to connect their meanings in your sentences.  Always check your spelling, punctuation marks, and capitalization.  Read your corrections every day. ^^



~T. Maine


If I have some problems, 
First I try to avoid the panic state and get some rest.
>> If I have some problems, first I try to avoid the panic state and get some rest. 
I would one step back, Analyzing the problems and thinkink about the solutions.
>> I would be one step back from analyzing the problems and thinking about the solutions. 
Nevertheless, I couldn't have a s
olution I might talk to someone to get help.
>> Nevertheless, if I couldn't have a solution, I might talk to someone to get help. 
It's not shameful behavior. 
>> Correct.  
I think, independent person is not that to slove all the problems myself.
>> I think an independent person does not need to solve all the problems himself. 
Independent person know their situation exactly and they can ask for the help to someone easily.
>> An independent person knows how to react to the situation and they can ask for help to someone easily. 
It is more important to act to solve the problem.
>> It is more important to act in solving the problem. 
It could be help to level up for me and I could get some good experience and skills.
>> It could be helpful for me to level up and I could get some good experiences and skills. 
Then I can solve another coming problems and even I can help someone.
>> Then I can solve the other inevitable problems as well as I can lend a hand to someone. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122313 How do you feel about your country¡¯s traditional music? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 1
122312 Please tell me about your first time talking with a foreigner. ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 1023
122311 09.13.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 3
122310 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 2279
122309 How My Parents Maintain a Good Health ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 603
122308 Do you think it¡¯s necessary to preserve traditions? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 1295
122307 Some topics I avoid when I talk with someone for the first time ¾È*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 2531
122306 What was one idea you learned from the drama Narco Saints? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 2
122305 9/13 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 1298
122304 what do you think of a career in the army? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 1281
122303 Book ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 941
122302 9/13 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 1193
122301 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 1084
122300 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 1112
122299 What do you want to do next year? Why? ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 4
122298 What do you like most about celebrating Cheusok? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 1386
122297 What are the good and bad things about traveling? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 1051
122296 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 2
122295 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 1060
122294 How to stop fake news. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 1398

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04