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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
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Homework

작성자: 김*우
2022-11-25 910

회원님의 영작문

Hi, T.Donna.
It was another busy day.
Dr. MJ and I had a final meeting with the interior company, and we decided to contract with them.
They showed us 3D picture of expected our new clinic.
As you can guess, it was amazing.
Also, they offered discount of payment.
Thus, we are going to contract with them next Monday.
About air conditioning, there were many companies, and we still didn't make a decision.
Maybe, we can decide to which company we contract next early week.
Besides of those, we should choose the company of internet, security, and so on...
I am totally exhausted, but I am full of good feelings.
Moving is coming soon.
I learned many things from this process of new building; for example, we shouldn't trust anyone.
We have to check all of our property directly.
Tomorrow, my parents and my brother's family will come to my house for celebrating of my father's birthday.
I am looking forward to tomorrow.
We will eat a plenty of delicious foods with So-Ju.
Have a nice weekend.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good evening, Dr. Kim!

Finally, everything is moving so smoothly in terms of your clinic construction and its agreed conditions. After all, a good open communication is key to any agreement. I wonder how your new clinic looks like. Perhaps you can describe it in class soon. Discounts are a great deal so, I hope that you will get all of your money's worth. Thus, tomorrow is another big day for the contract signing. Congratulations!

So, how was your family gathering? Being with the family strengthens us as human beings since we are tied to a bond of love and support. I guess it was definitely a wonderful time. I wish your father a very happy birthday!

Meanwhile, I feel so beat. I cannot say that I am happily exhausted this time, however, I can cope with this soon.

Your composition was systematic. One common grammar observation I made was the lack of use of 'the' to determine the noun whether specific or non-specific. For the other comments, you can read them below and analyze them carefully. 

See you in the morning!

-T. Donna~

Hi, T.Donna.
>> Correct!

It was another busy day.
>> Correct!

Dr. MJ and I had a final meeting with the interior company, and we decided to contract with them.
>> Correct!
Or: Dr. MJ and I had a final meeting with the interior company, and we decided to have a contract with them.

They showed us 3D picture of expected our new clinic.
>> They showed us the 3D picture of the expected new clinic.

As you can guess, it was amazing.
>> Correct!

Also, they offered discount of payment.
>> Correct!

Thus, we are going to contract with them next Monday.
>> Correct!
Or: Thus, we are going to sign a contract with them next Monday.

About air conditioning, there were many companies, and we still didn't make a decision.
>> Correct!
Or: About the air conditioning, there were many companies and we still didn't make a decision.

Maybe, we can decide to which company we contract next early week.
>> Maybe, we can decide in which company we will have a contract with next early week.

Besides of those, we should choose the company of internet, security, and so on...
>> Besides those, we should choose the company of internet, security, and so on...

I am totally exhausted, but I am full of good feelings.
>> Correct!

Moving is coming soon.
>> Correct!

I learned many things from this process of new building; for example, we shouldn't trust anyone.
>> I learned many things from this process of the new building; for example, we shouldn't trust anyone.

We have to check all of our property directly.
>> Correct!

Tomorrow, my parents and my brother's family will come to my house for celebrating of my father's birthday.
>> Correct!
Or: Tomorrow, my parents and my brother's family will come to my house to celebrate my father's birthday.

I am looking forward to tomorrow.
>> Correct!

We will eat a plenty of delicious foods with So-Ju.
>> We will eat plenty of delicious food with So-Ju.

Have a nice weekend.
>> Correct!
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