¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why do you think child abuse is an overlooked crime in some countries?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹®
2022-11-23 1395

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

First of all, most people consider children belong to their parents. Whether parents punish physically, the majority think it's their love. Also, they don't have much attention to others because they are busy making a living. So, I child abuse is overlooked especially in poverty nations. Living a day is more urgent than caring their kids and protecting children's right. Moreover, it is very hard to classify the punishment for education and child abuse with current laws. Actually, when someone accuse parents with child abuse, it is more likely to solve nothing. Even though the police office visits the house to check that there are problems, most officers just go back just giving some warnings. I agree that the child's right improved high than last few years. But the awareness that caring child is that house' jurisdiction makes child leave alone. The law should be strengthened and attention to our neighbor kids is essential. I hope that every kid live happy and healthy.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for this Mary. What about you? Do you think you had a happy childhood?

First of all, most people consider children belong to their parents. 
>>> correct
>>> OR: First of all, most people would think children belong to their parents.   
Whether parents punish physically, the majority think it's their love. 
>>>  correct  
Also, they don't have much attention to others because they are busy making a living. 
>>> OR: Also, they don't give much attention to others because they are busy making a living.  
So, I child abuse is overlooked especially in poverty nations. 
>>>  So, I think child abuse is overlooked especially in poor nations. 
>>> OR: So, I think child abuse is overlooked especially in nations under poverty.  
Living a day is more urgent than caring their kids and protecting children's right. 
>>> OR: Living each day is more a priority than caring for or protecting their children's right.  
Moreover, it is very hard to classify the punishment for education and child abuse with current laws. 
>>>  correct 
Actually, when someone accuse parents with child abuse, it is more likely to solve nothing. 
>>>  correct 
Even though the police office visits the house to check that there are problems, most officers just go back just giving some warnings. 
>>>  OR: Even though the police officer visits the house to check and see that there are problems, most officers just go back only giving some warnings.  
I agree that the child's right improved high than last few years.
 >>I agree that the child's right has improved higher than the last few years.  
But the awareness that caring child is that house' jurisdiction makes child leave alone. 
>>But the awareness that caring for a child is that house' jurisdiction makes the child live alone.    
The law should be strengthened and attention to our neighbor kids is essential. 
>>>   correct
I hope that every kid live happy and healthy.
>>>   I hope that every kid lives happy and healthy.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121116 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 2
121115 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 512
121114 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 246
121113 Which among your goals have you already achieved? ä*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 240
121112 Previous class review (Husbands job, Korea society problem) À¯*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 2
121111 Do you think that art is important to society? Why? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 359
121110 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 0
121109 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1
121108 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1
121107 smartphone Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 2
121106 move to ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 3
121105 What does your family do on Thanksgiving Day? ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 257
121104 Homework Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1058
121103 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 176
121102 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 328
121101 Write a script answering the question: Where do you live? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 314
121100 homework Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 168
121099 Who do you think has the most power in the family? Why? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 4
121098 07.26.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 2
121097 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 181

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04