¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What would the world be like if there was no marriage?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-11-21 1427

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Although, many people don't want to get married, they would like to meet someone for dating because people feel lonely and it is one of the important desires. I believe that couples would like to live together but no marriage and babies. They want to help each other but don't want to take each role as a man or a woman. Aging society already become a serious social problem. We have disscussed that who will pay for old people like pension, hospital fees and basic income because there will be more elderly than young people who can work. It is well known that unmarried people refuse to marrige due to the finance status. They have a lot of problem encountered to solve. First of all, they need to pay their debt back once they graduate from the university. After that, they struggle to get a job, but there are a few companies which offer good salary and welfare. Lastly, they don't want to have babies, although they get married because they are not affordable to raise children.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

Although, many people don't want to get married, they would like to meet someone for dating because people feel lonely and it is one of the important desires. 
>> CORRECT! 
I believe that couples would like to live together but no marriage and babies. 
>> CORRECT! 
They want to help each other but don't want to take each role as a man or a woman. 
>> CORRECT! 
Aging society already become a serious social problem. 
>> Aging society already becomes a serious social problem. 
We have disscussed that who will pay for old people like pension, hospital fees and basic income because there will be more elderly than young people who can work. 
>> We have discussed that no one will pay for old people like pension, hospital fees and basic income because there will be more elderly than young people who can work. 
It is well known that unmarried people refuse to marrige due to the finance status. 
>> It is well-known that unmarried people refuse to get married due to their financial status. 
They have a lot of problem encountered to solve. 
>> They have encountered a lot of problems to solve. 
First of all, they need to pay their debt back once they graduate from the university. 
>> CORRECT! 
After that, they struggle to get a job, but there are a few companies which offer good salary and welfare.
>> CORRECT! 
Lastly, they don't want to have babies, although they get married because they are not affordable to raise children.
>> Lastly, they don't want to have babies, although they get married because they can't afford to raise children.
 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124573 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 516
124572 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 804
124571 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 693
124570 the resolution ¹Ú*º° ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 612
124569 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 2
124568 What Disney character are you most similar to? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 792
124567 If a movie were based on a book, would you rather read the book... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 2
124566 My favorite things about winter vacation ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 982
124565 Answer about what is your favorite memory of 2022? Á¤*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 650
124564 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 0
124563 Monday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 703
124562 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 0
124561 retake ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 1
124560 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 0
124559 1/2 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 636
124558 some, any ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 1
124557 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 1
124556 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 905
124555 Happy new year! ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 620
124554 Worst vacation ever! ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-01-02 1029

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04