무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Why do you think work-life balance is important?

작성자: 김*문
2022-11-19 1667

회원님의 영작문

First of all, we have to think about the reason why we have a job. I think job makes own's life more energetic. Also, we can feel that we are essential members of society getting job. Because having job means that utilizes own's ability and it relates to make a living. As a result, I think job is important but it's supplementary one in our life. We have job to make comfortable and meaningful life. So, work-life balance is very important. If we got so much stress because of work, it is meaningless. However, Korea's work circumstance is strict and stressful due to working time and order of rank. As I know, people in foreign do their work in fixed working time whether there are lots of things they have to do and equal order system makes company effective. That's why they can separate work and life well. Spending time with family is more valuable than doing their work. Although, Korean know that fact, but the system isn't helpful. So, law about working time and salary is really needed.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thank you for this Mary. 

First of all, we have to think about the reason why we have a job. 
>>>  correct
I think job makes own's life more energetic. 
>>> OR:  I think the job makes one's life more energetic/meaningful.     
Also, we can feel that we are essential members of society getting job. 
>>> correct    
Because having job means that utilizes own's ability and it relates to make a living. 
>>> Because having job means that one utilizes his/her ability and it relates to making a living.     
As a result, I think job is important but it's supplementary one in our life. 
>>>  correct
>>> OR: As a result, I think job is important but it's a supplementary to one's life. 
We have job to make comfortable and meaningful life. 
>>> We have a job to make a comfortable and meaningful life.     
So, work-life balance is very important. 
>>> correct    
If we got so much stress because of work, it is meaningless. 
>>> correct        
However, Korea's work circumstance is strict and stressful due to working time and order of rank. 
>>> correct        
As I know, people in foreign do their work in fixed working time whether there are lots of things they have to do and equal order system makes company effective. 
>>> correct       
That's why they can separate work and life well. 
>>> correct    
Spending time with family is more valuable than doing their work.
>>> correct    
Although, Korean know that fact, but the system isn't helpful. 
>>> Although Korean know that fact, the system isn't helpful.     
So, law about working time and salary is really needed.
>>> correct         
번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
130664 Homework 김*숙 완료 2023-08-31 2569
130663 bout the place you last visited. 김*빈 완료 2023-08-31 1
130662 What kind of accommodation do you like to stay in when you... 조*지 완료 2023-08-31 0
130661 HOMEWORK-230831 양*애 완료 2023-08-31 1
130660 What is the difference between Generation X and Generation Z? 신*섭 완료 2023-08-31 2602
130659 Do you think you have a healthy lifestyle? 신*섭 완료 2023-08-31 1765
130658 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"My most... 앨* 완료 2023-08-31 1
130657 Homework 김*서 완료 2023-08-31 2
130656 Homework 류*우 완료 2023-08-31 2473
130655 What are the important things to bring on a trip? 김*연 완료 2023-08-31 6
130654 What does stress do to our body? 정*화 완료 2023-08-31 2033
130653 Do you think punishments should be strict or people should be... 복*훈 완료 2023-08-31 4
130652 Homework 김* 완료 2023-08-31 0
130651 What did you like to do when you were a child? 김*연 완료 2023-08-31 4
130650 WRITING TASK: When do you treat your friends? 임*지 완료 2023-08-31 4
130649 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG 완료 2023-08-31 1121
130648 Do you prefer traveling alone or traveling with family and... 김*연 완료 2023-08-31 2
130647 A mobile phone 김*아 완료 2023-08-31 2
130646 How do you feel about not taking a risk at all? 이*태 완료 2023-08-31 1911
130645 How do you feel about advising your friends? 이*태 완료 2023-08-31 1455

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]