무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Is it a good idea for Minister Lee Sang-min to step down from his position?

작성자: 김*문
2022-11-17 2168

회원님의 영작문

If he didn't do his best to prevent and solve the Itaewon accident, he deserves to step down from his position. However, it should not be the first step. At first, the prosecution has to confirm his guilt accurately. And then, they have to find out the problems of system and prepare methods to prevent those accidents. Minister Lee Sang-min also did his best whether he retires or not. Because he is leader of ministry of public administration and security. It means he has enormous responsibility of public security. Stepping down from the position shouldn't be the avoiding way from the fault. Cutting their tails with pressing core people to retire is the serious problem in Korea. When the Sewol fairy accident happened, the government solved problems with dismissing some people. So, it is not a good idea for Minister Lee Sang-min to step down from his position at least now. I hope the people who are guilty must be honest to keep their minimum fame.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thanks for this Mary. Yes, he should try to make up for his negligence or fault first before stepping down. In that way, he can still keep his dignity.

If he didn't do his best to prevent and solve the Itaewon accident, he deserves to step down from his position. 
>>>> correct  
However, it should not be the first step. 
>>>>  correct  
At first, the prosecution has to confirm his guilt accurately. 
>>>>  correct
>>> OR: First, the prosecution has to prove him guilty.
And then, they have to find out the problems of system and prepare methods to prevent those accidents. 
>>>> And then, they have to find out the problems in the system and prepare methods to prevent those accidents.    
Minister Lee Sang-min also did his best whether he retires or not. 
>>>> correct  
Because he is leader of ministry of public administration and security. 
>>>> Because he is the leader of ministry of public administration and security.   
It means he has enormous responsibility of public security. 
>>>> correct  
Stepping down from the position shouldn't be the avoiding way from the fault.
 >>>>  OR: Stepping down from the position shouldn't be his escape goat.
Cutting their tails with pressing core people to retire is the serious problem in Korea. 
>>>> correct   
When the Sewol fairy accident happened, the government solved problems with dismissing some people. 
>>>> When the Sewol Ferry accident happened, the government solved problems by dismissing some people.   
So, it is not a good idea for Minister Lee Sang-min to step down from his position at least now. 
>>>> correct  
I hope the people who are guilty must be honest to keep their minimum fame.
>>>> correct  

번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
120790 This is my academy writing homework. Could you please check only... 김*율 완료 2022-07-15 376
120789 Studying in cafe. 김*윤 완료 2022-07-15 660
120788 Friday Homework 류*우 완료 2022-07-15 676
120787 Homework 함*주 완료 2022-07-15 1
120786 homework 박*민 완료 2022-07-15 3
120785 previous class review. (face to face interview) 유*영 완료 2022-07-15 2
120784 homework 박*은 완료 2022-07-15 0
120783 Hi Gemmar 이*진 완료 2022-07-15 374
120782 Hi Gemmar 이*진 완료 2022-07-15 635
120781 7.15 homework 김* 완료 2022-07-15 218
120780 What are the advantages and disadvantages of buying a used car? 이*명 완료 2022-07-15 2
120779 Homework 김*우 완료 2022-07-15 343
120778 Why don’t parents do enough to stop their children from... 이*연 완료 2022-07-15 393
120777 Have you ever introduced yourself to a stranger in public? Why?... 전*연 완료 2022-07-15 2
120776 Restaurant cater 차*진 완료 2022-07-15 1
120775 What food would you always like to buy for your family? 박*영 완료 2022-07-15 617
120774 What advice would you give to someone with mental health issues? 김*연 완료 2022-07-15 2360
120773 Do you believe you can be better at speaking English? How? 박*아 완료 2022-07-15 1524
120772 Is cloning good or bad? Why or why not? 주*석 완료 2022-07-15 1
120771 What are some things people can do to keep healthy? 전*채 완료 2022-07-15 551

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]