무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Is it a good idea for Minister Lee Sang-min to step down from his position?

작성자: 김*문
2022-11-17 2158

회원님의 영작문

If he didn't do his best to prevent and solve the Itaewon accident, he deserves to step down from his position. However, it should not be the first step. At first, the prosecution has to confirm his guilt accurately. And then, they have to find out the problems of system and prepare methods to prevent those accidents. Minister Lee Sang-min also did his best whether he retires or not. Because he is leader of ministry of public administration and security. It means he has enormous responsibility of public security. Stepping down from the position shouldn't be the avoiding way from the fault. Cutting their tails with pressing core people to retire is the serious problem in Korea. When the Sewol fairy accident happened, the government solved problems with dismissing some people. So, it is not a good idea for Minister Lee Sang-min to step down from his position at least now. I hope the people who are guilty must be honest to keep their minimum fame.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thanks for this Mary. Yes, he should try to make up for his negligence or fault first before stepping down. In that way, he can still keep his dignity.

If he didn't do his best to prevent and solve the Itaewon accident, he deserves to step down from his position. 
>>>> correct  
However, it should not be the first step. 
>>>>  correct  
At first, the prosecution has to confirm his guilt accurately. 
>>>>  correct
>>> OR: First, the prosecution has to prove him guilty.
And then, they have to find out the problems of system and prepare methods to prevent those accidents. 
>>>> And then, they have to find out the problems in the system and prepare methods to prevent those accidents.    
Minister Lee Sang-min also did his best whether he retires or not. 
>>>> correct  
Because he is leader of ministry of public administration and security. 
>>>> Because he is the leader of ministry of public administration and security.   
It means he has enormous responsibility of public security. 
>>>> correct  
Stepping down from the position shouldn't be the avoiding way from the fault.
 >>>>  OR: Stepping down from the position shouldn't be his escape goat.
Cutting their tails with pressing core people to retire is the serious problem in Korea. 
>>>> correct   
When the Sewol fairy accident happened, the government solved problems with dismissing some people. 
>>>> When the Sewol Ferry accident happened, the government solved problems by dismissing some people.   
So, it is not a good idea for Minister Lee Sang-min to step down from his position at least now. 
>>>> correct  
I hope the people who are guilty must be honest to keep their minimum fame.
>>>> correct  

번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
120974 ? 김*엽 완료 2022-07-21 304
120973 homework 박*민 완료 2022-07-21 2
120972 Is there a kind of food that you will never eat? 김*환 완료 2022-07-21 208
120971 My first diary 지*진 완료 2022-07-21 2331
120970 homework 김*연 완료 2022-07-21 610
120969 What would be the advantages and disadvantages of making all... 권*원 완료 2022-07-21 780
120968 Why do you think culture is important? 김*환 완료 2022-07-21 284
120967 What would the world be like without chocolate? 태*서 완료 2022-07-21 345
120966 Which is the more important thing to see: the advantage or the... 이*연 완료 2022-07-21 479
120965 For you, what makes one person more attractive than another? 김*경 완료 2022-07-21 324
120964 What would the world be like without chocolate? 최*교 완료 2022-07-21 182
120963 invite 민*정 완료 2022-07-21 1
120962 Homework for 07.21.2022 김*정 완료 2022-07-21 3
120961 Do you think parents nowadays are different from parents in the... 류*주 완료 2022-07-21 437
120960 What\'s the most fun you\'ve had while studying? 황*별 완료 2022-07-21 381
120959 Thursday homework 류*우 완료 2022-07-21 262
120958 Homework 김*우 완료 2022-07-21 283
120957 Can you concentrate on other things when you are listening to... 김*연 완료 2022-07-21 0
120956 Which one do you think is better, owning your home or renting a... 백*원 완료 2022-07-21 179
120955 Homework 이*명 완료 2022-07-21 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]