¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you agree that the police should be held accountable for what happened in Itaewon? Why or why not

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼±*
2022-11-16 1946

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I agree that the not only police but also government should also be held accountable for what happened that day. That's because the police are not at the level to make decisions in the bureaucracy, which means following the orders from the top. The police couldn't command orders without the top dogs' permission.
In addition, that day they had special order from the ministers for checking drug users, so they focused on the mission. One policeman working in that district recognized the heavy crowd and asked to send more policemen there, but his requisitions were neglected. he must have been there and known the seriousness of the situation. However, nobody tried to listen to him, and the tragedy and crowd crush happened at the speed of blinking eyes.
In conclusion, the government must say sorry to the victims and they blame themselves for their negligence, laziness, and ignorance.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Miss Sun!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

I agree that the not only police but also government should also be held accountable for what happened that day. 
>> CORRECT! 
That's because the police are not at the level to make decisions in the bureaucracy, which means following the orders from the top. 
>> CORRECT! 
The police couldn't command orders without the top dogs' permission.
>> CORRECT! 
In addition, that day they had special order from the ministers for checking drug users, so they focused on the mission. 
>> CORRECT! 
One policeman working in that district recognized the heavy crowd and asked to send more policemen there, but his requisitions were neglected. 
>> CORRECT! 
he must have been there and known the seriousness of the situation. 
>> CORRECT! 
However, nobody tried to listen to him, and the tragedy and crowd crush happened at the speed of blinking eyes.
>> CORRECT! 
In conclusion, the government must say sorry to the victims and they blame themselves for their negligence, laziness, and ignorance.
>> CORRECT! 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123745 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-23 1640
123744 grow up ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-23 1
123743 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-23 0
123742 Answer the following questions ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-11-23 1318
123741 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-11-23 1714
123740 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-23 1602
123739 What do you think about South Korea\'s chances in the World Cup... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-11-23 2
123738 Essay ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-11-23 1907
123737 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-23 2
123736 22.Nov.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-23 1
123735 Describe a very pretty coffee shop you have been to before. ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-11-23 2
123734 Are there any sports you can\'t stand to see on TV? What are... ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-11-22 1540
123733 Korea¡¯s educational competition¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-11-22 1729
123732 Christmas to me is not a religious day. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-11-22 1556
123731 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-11-22 2
123730 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-22 1533
123729 Some people feel the education style of schools damages... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-22 1933
123728 job interview ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-22 1
123727 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-22 1348
123726 My childhood memories ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-22 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04