¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why is doing volunteer work important?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±¸*¿ì
2022-11-13 2701

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It's because volunteering helps poverty family or people, and it is good to our emotion like happy or great. And maybe I will respect about how the poverty people survived this extreme environment and facility or we can empathize their feeling at that time.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Daisy. :)
Thank you for writing this essay. 
Volunteering is good because it opens our eyes to the dire situation of other people which in turn helps us empathize and extend a helping hand. 
I hope this day is going great for you. ^^
See you again later. ^^
~Teacher Charry

It's because volunteering helps poverty family or people, and it is good to our emotion like happy or great. 
>> It's because volunteering helps poor families or people, and it is good for our emotions because helping others can make us feel happy or great. 
And maybe I will respect about how the poverty people survived this extreme environment and facility or we can empathize their feeling at that time.
>> In addition, maybe it helps us learn how to respect poor people and realize how they are able to survive an extreme environment or situation. Volunteering helps us empathize with how they feel at that time. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123576 14.Nov .2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 2
123575 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 1704
123574 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 0
123573 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 1
123572 What do you think is the most serious problem in the world? ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 9
123571 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 2
123570 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 1677
123569 What book had the biggest impact on your life and why? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 1760
123568 Which is more powerful between feelings of love and feelings of... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 1694
123567 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 2446
123566 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 0
123565 Should books be censored? Why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 2360
123564 Elementary is the last time that students can enjoy freedom ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 1
123563 Monday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 2144
123562 Travel plans of this year ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 2
123561 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 1
123560 homework ◡̈ ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 0
123559 What do you think will happen if your country falls into a... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-14 1825
123558 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-11-13 3
123557 Why is doing volunteer work important? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-13 2701

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04