¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Is it a good reason to have children to avoid being lonely later in life? If raising children were f

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2022-11-10 1483

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don¡¯t deny that I wanted to have many children to make me much happier. However, having children is not only for me but also for them. People need protection and care until they are grown up enough to stand on their feet. The better support for them, the better for them. When it comes to raising children, just money is not the key to all problems. Children need more than that. they need enough love and caring, which is the reason why the number of children I have should be limited. If raising children were free with unprecedented government support, I couldn¡¯t have more than four children because I want to give them respectively as much love as I can.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Steve! ^^
Thank you for the composition.
See you in our next class! :)

~ Teacher Tricia


I don¡¯t deny that I wanted to have many children to make me much happier. 
>>> CORRECT!

However, having children is not only for me but also for them. People need protection and care until they are grown up enough to stand on their feet. 
>>> CORRECT!

The better support for them, the better for them. When it comes to raising children, just money is not the key to all problems. 
>>> CORRECT!

Children need more than that. they need enough love and caring, which is the reason why the number of children I have should be limited. 
>>> CORRECT!

If raising children were free with unprecedented government support, I couldn¡¯t have more than four children because I want to give them respectively as much love as I can.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120930 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 172
120929 Is religion important? ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 299
120928 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 2
120927 Do you prefer to have many friends or just a few that you are... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 311
120926 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 245
120925 How do you feel about artificial intelligence-assisted... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 378
120924 homework Á¤*È£ ÁøÇàÁß 2022-07-20 0
120923 homework Á¤*È£ ÁøÇàÁß 2022-07-20 1
120922 About the zombie village. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 237
120921 homework on July 19th ÀÌ* ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 413
120920 What is the perfect thing to do during summer there in your... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 309
120919 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 203
120918 [2022.07.20_H.W] What do you like best about your culture? ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 254
120917 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 3
120916 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 117
120915 Why do you think people send their elders to nursing homes? Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 402
120914 homework on July 18th ÀÌ* ÁøÇàÁß 2022-07-20 119
120913 There are people who are anti-vaxxers. What do you think of them? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 511
120912 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 1
120911 Homework ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-20 480

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04