¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How do you feel when you take food supplements? Share your answer in a few sentences.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¿¬
2022-11-01 1415

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I believed taking collagen will be helpful to cure stretchmarks because i gained weight over the years. So, i tried a low molecular fish collagen which is a powder type, but i felt nothing. There¡¯s no effect on my skin, and i realized it¡¯s difficult to remove it once it appears.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Judy!

Congratulations to your perfect grammar here on your homework answer! Unfortunately, you do not feel any good effect from collagen. Hence, there is no better substiture to eating less and also moving more.

Your composition had a very good introduction, a detailed body, and a complete conclusion. Great job!

See you later in class!

-T. Donna~

I believed taking collagen will be helpful to cure stretchmarks because i gained weight over the years. 
>> Correct!
Or: I believed taking collagen will be helpful to cure stretchmarks because I gained weight over the years. 

So, i tried a low molecular fish collagen which is a powder type, but i felt nothing. 
>> Correct!
Or: So, I tried a low molecular fish collagen which is a powder type, but I felt nothing. 

There¡¯s no effect on my skin, and i realized it¡¯s difficult to remove it once it appears.
>> Correct!
Or: There¡¯s no effect on my skin, and I realized that it¡¯s difficult to remove it once it appears.ambiance 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124142 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 0
124141 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 1020
124140 What do you think are the challenges that married career women... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 767
124139 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 1
124138 What kind of lie do you think people commonly say? ±è*¹® ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 1243
124137 Homework 12/13 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 4
124136 What type of transportation do you prefer? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-13 0
124135 Do you think there is a connection between beauty and... Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 1
124134 What are the major tourist attractions in your city? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 0
124133 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 1354
124132 Do you think you are easily persuaded to buy things after seeing... Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 1
124131 How do you deal with people who cannot meet their deadlines? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 2
124130 12/12 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 1172
124129 why mbti test becomes popular ¾È*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 2269
124128 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 0
124127 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 0
124126 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 1115
124125 HOMEWORK: Is increasing your vocabulary important? What... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 0
124124 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 2
124123 hoemwork ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-12 986

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04