¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

10/24 homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2022-10-30 2760

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I often hope to be at a spa or get some massage for relaxing whole body when I feel tired and stressed.
I have been in the mood for a relaxing treat this week because of my work.
I had an important presentation for a conference last thursday.
I felt burdonsome and stressful preparing this presentation for recent few weeks.
Even the day before the presentaion, I couldn't sleep well because I was so nervous.
Luckily, I finished my presentation well.
After I ended my presentation, I felt comfort and tired.
So, I spent time supplementing my sleep and shopping.
As though I recieved a relaxing treat, I was refreshed and relaxed without worry.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Dr. Stella!

It is wonderful to know that if you are in a mood for some treat for yourself, you go for it. I think that is very brave and well deserved. When you are tired and feel to simply relax, soothe yourself.

Below, there are some spelling and grammar suggestions. Moreover, word forms vary when used in different positions in sentences. Hence, kindly go over the sentences carefully and make sure to note down the correct word forms. 

Excellent exposition! See you again soon!

-T. Donna~

I often hope to be at a spa or get some massage for relaxing whole body when I feel tired and stressed.
>>  I often hope to be at a spa or get some massage for relaxing the whole body when I feel tired and stressed.

I have been in the mood for a relaxing treat this week because of my work.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

I had an important presentation for a conference last thursday.
>> Correct!
Or: Thursday

I felt burdonsome and stressful preparing this presentation for recent few weeks.
>>  I felt burdensome and stressed preparing for this presentation for the recent few weeks.

Even the day before the presentaion, I couldn't sleep well because I was so nervous.
>> Correct!
Or: presentation

Luckily, I finished my presentation well.
>> Correct!

After I ended my presentation, I felt comfort and tired.
>> Correct!

So, I spent time supplementing my sleep and shopping.
>> Correct!

As though I recieved a relaxing treat, I was refreshed and relaxed without worry.
>> As I have received a relaxing treat, I was refreshed and relaxed without worries.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122509 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 2
122508 What are the toughest jobs in the world? Why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1043
122507 What is the correct situation in Korea\'s economy? If I will be... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1535
122506 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 0
122505 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 0
122504 How do young people in your culture behave differently from... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1359
122503 It¡¯s not good for our health. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1128
122502 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1877
122501 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1920
122500 home work(?) ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1500
122499 homework ◡̈ ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1
122498 Greeting Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1
122497 09.21.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1
122496 What is the TV program you like watching? Tell me about that... ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1373
122495 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 0
122494 Seek ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1
122493 What are the possible benefits of working on weekends? Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1198
122492 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1
122491 20. Sep.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 3
122490 What do you usually do on weekends? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04