¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

10/24 homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2022-10-30 3020

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I often hope to be at a spa or get some massage for relaxing whole body when I feel tired and stressed.
I have been in the mood for a relaxing treat this week because of my work.
I had an important presentation for a conference last thursday.
I felt burdonsome and stressful preparing this presentation for recent few weeks.
Even the day before the presentaion, I couldn't sleep well because I was so nervous.
Luckily, I finished my presentation well.
After I ended my presentation, I felt comfort and tired.
So, I spent time supplementing my sleep and shopping.
As though I recieved a relaxing treat, I was refreshed and relaxed without worry.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Dr. Stella!

It is wonderful to know that if you are in a mood for some treat for yourself, you go for it. I think that is very brave and well deserved. When you are tired and feel to simply relax, soothe yourself.

Below, there are some spelling and grammar suggestions. Moreover, word forms vary when used in different positions in sentences. Hence, kindly go over the sentences carefully and make sure to note down the correct word forms. 

Excellent exposition! See you again soon!

-T. Donna~

I often hope to be at a spa or get some massage for relaxing whole body when I feel tired and stressed.
>>  I often hope to be at a spa or get some massage for relaxing the whole body when I feel tired and stressed.

I have been in the mood for a relaxing treat this week because of my work.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

I had an important presentation for a conference last thursday.
>> Correct!
Or: Thursday

I felt burdonsome and stressful preparing this presentation for recent few weeks.
>>  I felt burdensome and stressed preparing for this presentation for the recent few weeks.

Even the day before the presentaion, I couldn't sleep well because I was so nervous.
>> Correct!
Or: presentation

Luckily, I finished my presentation well.
>> Correct!

After I ended my presentation, I felt comfort and tired.
>> Correct!

So, I spent time supplementing my sleep and shopping.
>> Correct!

As though I recieved a relaxing treat, I was refreshed and relaxed without worry.
>> As I have received a relaxing treat, I was refreshed and relaxed without worries.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
127022 Home work ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 1
127021 The complaints ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 716
127020 HOMRWORK ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 1
127019 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 723
127018 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 1
127017 Do you think taking a nap can help you gain more energy to... ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 2
127016 How do you keep a fun and friendly conversation with people you... ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 2
127015 Hw ÃÖ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 1
127014 Describe yellow. ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 0
127013 Hw ÃÖ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 959
127012 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 1226
127011 We should protect our and descendant life from climate change. ÀÌ*¿õ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 12
127010 What are some ways to cope with feelings of guilt after a break... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 1
127009 Homework ¹è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 755
127008 3 words that describe me the best ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 33
127007 What present do you want on your birthday? Why? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 0
127006 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 5
127005 ¤Ó Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 848
127004 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 901
127003 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04