¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Explain one of the good movies you have seen. Why is it good?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*°æ
2022-10-27 1950

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Personally, I am really into watching movies and it is one of my favorite hobbies.
About 2 months ago, my family watched a movie titled "Confidential Assignment2: International"
It is an action and comedy movie. There are starred a lot of famous actors here in South Korea.
Because the concept and story are fun and not violent, it is really suitable for family as well as the younger generation.
Especially, there are 2 actors who are Hyun Bin, and Daniel Henny. They are pretty hansome and wonderful with action scenes.
Apart from that, seeing my son's laughing while the movie, it is enough to make me happy.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Jane!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


Personally, I am really into watching movies and it is one of my favorite hobbies.

>> CORRECT!


About 2 months ago, my family watched a movie titled "Confidential Assignment2: International"

>> About 2 months ago, my family watched a movie titled, "Confidential Assignment2: International".


It is an action and comedy movie. 

>> CORRECT!


There are starred a lot of famous actors here in South Korea.

>> It starred a lot of famous actors here in South Korea.


Because the concept and story are fun and not violent, it is really suitable for family as well as the younger generation.

>> Because the concept and story are fun and not violent, it is really suitable for a family as well as for the younger generation.


Especially, there are 2 actors who are Hyun Bin, and Daniel Henny. 
They are pretty hansome and wonderful with action scenes.

>>  Especially the two actors who are in that movie, Hyun Bin, and Daniel Henny, were pretty handsome and were wonderful in action scenes.


Apart from that, seeing my son's laughing while the movie, it is enough to make me happy.

>> Apart from that, seeing my son laughing while watching the movie is enough to make me happy.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119600 Training ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-05 3
119599 Do you agree that the government should reveal the list of... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-05 152
119598 What kind of a leader do you think your country needs? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-05 160
119597 What kind of leader is a good leader? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-05 274
119596 How can I relieve stress. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-06-04 109
119595 Why I like Doctor Strange 2. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-06-04 94
119594 Why I want to visit America. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-06-04 141
119593 Why I will not study aboard. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-06-04 138
119592 Do you think that you should change your eating habits? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-06-04 271
119591 How do you get along with people who do not like you that much?... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-04 281
119590 the reason why i am busy ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-04 238
119589 What should governments be doing about monkey pox? What might... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-04 129
119588 What three things are most important for you in a job? Why? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-04 143
119587 What do you think are the dangers of not using facemasks in... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-04 111
119586 Do you think that you should change your eating habits? Why or... ÀÌ* ¿Ï·á 2022-06-04 2
119585 6.3 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-06-04 159
119584 What is the first thing you notice about a person? Why do you... ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-04 306
119583 The character of the person I would like to date. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-06-03 119
119582 6/3 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-03 86
119581 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-03 132

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04