¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

That¡¯s possible!

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*À±
2022-10-21 1812

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Yes. That's possible. Because the more social networking sites you have, the more you can focus on them and neglect real life. Then you may gradually lose friends or you may lose your grades because you cannot concentrate on your studies. Then people will be lonely.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Sheila! ^^
Thank you for the composition.
See you in our next class! :)

~ Teacher Tricia

Yes. That's possible. 
>>> CORRECT!

Because the more social networking sites you have, the more you can focus on them and neglect real life. 
>>> CORRECT!

Then you may gradually lose friends or you may lose your grades because you cannot concentrate on your studies. 
>>> CORRECT!

Then people will be lonely.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120438 The homework about the definitions of the words ¾È*Çå ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 304
120437 Homework and asking for understanding ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 292
120436 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 377
120435 Traveling ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 2
120434 Last conversation. (My younger brother\'s investment) À¯*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 2
120433 Homework ÇÏ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 5
120432 Homework ÀÌ*¸í ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 5
120431 Job interview Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 1
120430 With a curfew, teenagers can¡¯t have any fun. Do you agree? Why... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 451
120429 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 9
120428 What are your plans this coming weekend? ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 397
120427 advantages and disadvantages for the child of having a large... ³ë*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 2
120426 Homework for 07.04.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 2
120425 Who is the person that you admire the most? Why? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 0
120424 What are your daily habits? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 410
120423 What culture in South Korea would you want to bring back? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-07-05 434
120422 Writing Task(Jul 1th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-07-04 368
120421 Have you ever rented a house to live in before? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-04 4
120420 Can you think of some reason why people don\'t keep dogs or cats? ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2022-07-04 260
120419 7/4 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-04 345

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04