¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Have you ever worked for a company that has implemented any innovative ideas?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2022-10-19 3248

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I used to work for a construction company that planned and constructed the apartment with an ergonomic design which was an innovative design then. We tried to provide houses with more comfortable and human-friendly ideas. Our company fell behind in construction experience in spite of super sound finance because our company belatedly entered the construction industry as a subsidiary of a conglomerate in Korea. We had a passion to be the first in the Korean construction industry so that we needed something innovative to tell us from other competitors or make us noteworthy, which made us focus on innovative design for houses that other companies had never considered yet.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Steve!

I appreciate the time you took to accomplish this homework. Thank you for answering the question in a detailed and coherent manner. 

You are great at making sentences and explaining the past of your previous workplace. I hope you find the minor corrections below helpful in your writing. 


Until our next class!


~ Teacher Gela



I used to work for a construction company that planned and constructed the apartment with an ergonomic design which was an innovative design then. 
>> I used to work for a construction company that planned and constructed an apartment with an ergonomic design which was innovative then. 

We tried to provide houses with more comfortable and human-friendly ideas. 
>> CORRECT

Our company fell behind in construction experience in spite of super sound finance because our company belatedly entered the construction industry as a subsidiary of a conglomerate in Korea. 
>> Our company fell behind in construction experience despite super-sound finances because it belatedly entered the construction industry as a subsidiary of a conglomerate in Korea. 

We had a passion to be the first in the Korean construction industry so that we needed something innovative to tell us from other competitors or make us noteworthy, which made us focus on innovative design for houses that other companies had never considered yet.
>> We were passionate about becoming the first in the Korean construction industry, so we needed something innovative to tell us from other competitors or make us noteworthy, which made us focus on innovative designs for houses that other companies had never considered.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
127539 What comes to mind when you hear the word ¡®socialism¡¯? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 4
127538 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 0
127537 What talent do you wish you¡¯d have? ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 1
127536 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 0
127535 If you were a billionaire what will you do with your money? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 0
127534 Would you prefer to live in a really old historical city, or a... ±è*¸§ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 939
127533 Monday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 936
127532 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 2
127531 How has the global pandemic affected the employment market in... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 1463
127530 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 807
127529 which greetings are typical in your country?/ why greetings are... ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 3
127528 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 1072
127527 Home work ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 1
127526 Do you agree that a student¡¯s bullying records should reflect... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 1817
127525 Essay homework (04/17) ÃÖ*Çå ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 1233
127524 Alone ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 0
127523 4.17 homework ±Ç*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 1319
127522 What are the reasons we visit art museums? õ*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 2
127521 Do you think studying the grammar of your native language is... õ*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 2
127520 4/17 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-04-17 969

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04