¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

10/18 homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2022-10-19 2244

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I feel happy with daily simple things.
When I leave work, I used to talk to my mother on the phone.
I tell the events which happen in the hospital and my mother speak to me about news.
It's not a long time, but conversation with my mother gives me comfort.
On weekends, I usually sleep long time to supplement short sleep during weekdays.
After a long and deep sleep, I feel refreshed.
Also, I spend wonderful time with my family and friends during weekends.
Recently, I'm really into a drama named 'good doctor'.
It is about the growth of a doctor who has autism.
I watch the drama by one or two episodes every night.
This is like a gift for me who work very hard during daytime.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Dr. Stella!

They say that the best things in world are free- conversations with your mother, sleep, some good drama, among others. If we have simple pleasures, we can always be happy. However, sometimes, big accomplishments as well make us proud and contented. As you are a young great doctor that you are, you are your parents joy and pride.

If you take a look at the suggestions I made below, there are just a few of them such as the insertion of 'a' or 'the', and some subject-verb agreement. Read them well.

Your composition is always full of interesting information and these are stated in an artistic way. Thanks for always honing your writing skills! Carry on.

See you soon!

-T. Donna~

I feel happy with daily simple things.
>> Correct!
Or: I am happy with simple things daily.

When I leave work, I used to talk to my mother on the phone.
>> Correct!

I tell the events which happen in the hospital and my mother speak to me about news.
>> I tell the events which happen in the hospital and my mother speaks to me about the news. 

It's not a long time, but conversation with my mother gives me comfort.
>> Correct!
Or: Even not for a long time, conversations with my mother give me comfort.

On weekends, I usually sleep long time to supplement short sleep during weekdays.
>> On weekends, I usually sleep for a long time to supplement the short sleep during weekdays.

After a long and deep sleep, I feel refreshed.
>> Correct!

Also, I spend wonderful time with my family and friends during weekends.
>> Also, I spend a wonderful time with my family and friends during weekends.

Recently, I'm really into a drama named 'good doctor'.
>>  Correct!
Or: Recently, I'm really into a drama named 'Good Doctor'.

It is about the growth of a doctor who has autism.
>> Correct!

I watch the drama by one or two episodes every night.
>> Correct!

This is like a gift for me who work very hard during daytime.
>>  This is like a gift for me who works very hard during daytime.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124415 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 712
124414 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 1
124413 What was the most memorable vacation you ever had? Why? ±è*¹® ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 621
124412 My New Year¡¯s resolution ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 635
124411 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 1
124410 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 584
124409 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 733
124408 Who\'re you? Santa C.! Who\'s that? That\'s me! No way! Yes way!... ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 773
124407 Sensitivity ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 2
124406 12/26 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 3
124405 23.Dec.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 3
124404 What\'s the funniest book you have ever read? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 709
124403 Who is your favorite actor and why? Answer in a few sentences. ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-26 723
124402 Did you enjoy your trip to Suwon? What is the best thing about... ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-12-25 797
124401 Does social media improve people¡¯s communication skills? Why or... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-25 700
124400 What makes you happy? Why does it make you happy? :) ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-25 649
124399 How is social media changing parent and child relationships? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-25 650
124398 What countries would you not like to visit and why? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-25 1
124397 How can people socialize better? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-12-25 0
124396 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-25 562

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04