¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

10/18 homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2022-10-19 2900

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I feel happy with daily simple things.
When I leave work, I used to talk to my mother on the phone.
I tell the events which happen in the hospital and my mother speak to me about news.
It's not a long time, but conversation with my mother gives me comfort.
On weekends, I usually sleep long time to supplement short sleep during weekdays.
After a long and deep sleep, I feel refreshed.
Also, I spend wonderful time with my family and friends during weekends.
Recently, I'm really into a drama named 'good doctor'.
It is about the growth of a doctor who has autism.
I watch the drama by one or two episodes every night.
This is like a gift for me who work very hard during daytime.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Dr. Stella!

They say that the best things in world are free- conversations with your mother, sleep, some good drama, among others. If we have simple pleasures, we can always be happy. However, sometimes, big accomplishments as well make us proud and contented. As you are a young great doctor that you are, you are your parents joy and pride.

If you take a look at the suggestions I made below, there are just a few of them such as the insertion of 'a' or 'the', and some subject-verb agreement. Read them well.

Your composition is always full of interesting information and these are stated in an artistic way. Thanks for always honing your writing skills! Carry on.

See you soon!

-T. Donna~

I feel happy with daily simple things.
>> Correct!
Or: I am happy with simple things daily.

When I leave work, I used to talk to my mother on the phone.
>> Correct!

I tell the events which happen in the hospital and my mother speak to me about news.
>> I tell the events which happen in the hospital and my mother speaks to me about the news. 

It's not a long time, but conversation with my mother gives me comfort.
>> Correct!
Or: Even not for a long time, conversations with my mother give me comfort.

On weekends, I usually sleep long time to supplement short sleep during weekdays.
>> On weekends, I usually sleep for a long time to supplement the short sleep during weekdays.

After a long and deep sleep, I feel refreshed.
>> Correct!

Also, I spend wonderful time with my family and friends during weekends.
>> Also, I spend a wonderful time with my family and friends during weekends.

Recently, I'm really into a drama named 'good doctor'.
>>  Correct!
Or: Recently, I'm really into a drama named 'Good Doctor'.

It is about the growth of a doctor who has autism.
>> Correct!

I watch the drama by one or two episodes every night.
>> Correct!

This is like a gift for me who work very hard during daytime.
>>  This is like a gift for me who works very hard during daytime.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120230 What is the scariest story that you know? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-06-28 360
120229 What is a memorable food that you ate in a different country? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 3
120228 The discovery of fire. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 486
120227 IELTS part2 ÇÔ*¸® ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 2
120226 6/27 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 415
120225 What are the advantages and disadvantages of living in a small... ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 812
120224 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 0
120223 What was your dream job when you were young? ÇÑ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 605
120222 What¡¯s the best way to stop being bored? Answer in 5 sentences... ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 634
120221 Homework ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 537
120220 Some people do not like to talk about politics. How about you,... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 1206
120219 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 932
120218 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 597
120217 About friends ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 3
120216 What do you think is the best age to be? Explain your opinion. ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 4
120215 How do you think the discovery of fire changed the life of... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 716
120214 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 1
120213 The reason why there are generally few women in top positions. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 647
120212 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 886
120211 Homework {06/27} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 435

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04