¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

10/18 homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2022-10-19 2822

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I feel happy with daily simple things.
When I leave work, I used to talk to my mother on the phone.
I tell the events which happen in the hospital and my mother speak to me about news.
It's not a long time, but conversation with my mother gives me comfort.
On weekends, I usually sleep long time to supplement short sleep during weekdays.
After a long and deep sleep, I feel refreshed.
Also, I spend wonderful time with my family and friends during weekends.
Recently, I'm really into a drama named 'good doctor'.
It is about the growth of a doctor who has autism.
I watch the drama by one or two episodes every night.
This is like a gift for me who work very hard during daytime.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Dr. Stella!

They say that the best things in world are free- conversations with your mother, sleep, some good drama, among others. If we have simple pleasures, we can always be happy. However, sometimes, big accomplishments as well make us proud and contented. As you are a young great doctor that you are, you are your parents joy and pride.

If you take a look at the suggestions I made below, there are just a few of them such as the insertion of 'a' or 'the', and some subject-verb agreement. Read them well.

Your composition is always full of interesting information and these are stated in an artistic way. Thanks for always honing your writing skills! Carry on.

See you soon!

-T. Donna~

I feel happy with daily simple things.
>> Correct!
Or: I am happy with simple things daily.

When I leave work, I used to talk to my mother on the phone.
>> Correct!

I tell the events which happen in the hospital and my mother speak to me about news.
>> I tell the events which happen in the hospital and my mother speaks to me about the news. 

It's not a long time, but conversation with my mother gives me comfort.
>> Correct!
Or: Even not for a long time, conversations with my mother give me comfort.

On weekends, I usually sleep long time to supplement short sleep during weekdays.
>> On weekends, I usually sleep for a long time to supplement the short sleep during weekdays.

After a long and deep sleep, I feel refreshed.
>> Correct!

Also, I spend wonderful time with my family and friends during weekends.
>> Also, I spend a wonderful time with my family and friends during weekends.

Recently, I'm really into a drama named 'good doctor'.
>>  Correct!
Or: Recently, I'm really into a drama named 'Good Doctor'.

It is about the growth of a doctor who has autism.
>> Correct!

I watch the drama by one or two episodes every night.
>> Correct!

This is like a gift for me who work very hard during daytime.
>>  This is like a gift for me who works very hard during daytime.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120660 Hi Gemmar ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 669
120659 Hi Gemmar ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 451
120658 My children ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 3
120657 Homework ÀÌ*¸í ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 2
120656 Do you think we will find an environmentally friendly... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 533
120655 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 1194
120654 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 757
120653 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 899
120652 SUMMER ³ë*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 1423
120651 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 889
120650 Which classmates do I sometimes spend my breaks with? The reason... ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 817
120649 What do you think is the easiest thing about learning English? ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 656
120648 Many young people today spend too much time following the latest... ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 0
120647 Which greeting kind of annoys you? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 695
120646 Do you think robots or AI will replace human teachers in the... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-07-12 874
120645 7.11. Monday ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 828
120644 What illness are you afraid of the most and why? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 676
120643 Do you think robots or AI will replace human teachers in the... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 670
120642 7/11 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 858
120641 Do you think the health care system in your country offers... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 868

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04