¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2022-10-17 1806

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Good evening, T. Donna.
It was not too busy in my clinic today.
Today, we have three new members, but one of them resigned a few hours later.
Because we have enough numbers of staff, it's not a serious problem, I think.
Last weekend, I did nothing to special and just took a rest in most of the time.
Thus, I thought I would be recharged, but I don't have energy all day.
Maybe I am sick of all my work these days.
However, It will be alright.
That's because I can open the roof of my car tonight.
I am looking forward to that moment.
About taking a risk, as we grow older, most of us would like to be stable.
When we were young, we don't have many things to concern.
We still had another chance, and unless we would be succeeded, we could find other things.
That's because we were not responsible for my family, and there was nothing to lose.
However, as you know, Dr. MJ and I decided to take a big risk to move our clinic.
It's a wonderful challenge.
Now I should get going.
See you tomorrow.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello! Good afternoon, Dr. Kim!

How's your clinic today? I hope that everything works according to your expectations. You have to pray at the start of the day to achieve your daily goals towards your new clinic. Anyway, I hope that you are fully charged to face all the adversities and challenges of Tuesday.

As we grow older, we want to avoid taking risks becuase we have the knack to foresee results in the future. However, this limits our growth and hampers our skills from growing. Hence, as e grow older, for me, it's better to be bolder than ever to get what we want in life.

Time is the most crcial thing as we age. So if we never risked it, we can never be full happy in this life time.

Your compositon has your own style and pattern I am excited to read always. Then, go over my grammar suggestions religiously.

Have a great lunch and stay focused for the rest of the afternoon.

-T. Donna~

Good evening, T. Donna.
>> Correct!

It was not too busy in my clinic today.
>> Correct!

Today, we have three new members, but one of them resigned a few hours later.
>> Corerct!

Because we have enough numbers of staff, it's not a serious problem, I think.
>> Correct!

Last weekend, I did nothing to special and just took a rest in most of the time.
>> Last weekend, I did nothing too special and just took a rest most of the time.

Thus, I thought I would be recharged, but I don't have energy all day.
>> Correct!

Maybe I am sick of all my work these days.
>> Correct!

However, It will be alright.
>> Correct!
Or: However, it will be alright.

That's because I can open the roof of my car tonight.
>> Correct!

I am looking forward to that moment.
>> Correct!

About taking a risk, as we grow older, most of us would like to be stable.
>> Correct!

When we were young, we don't have many things to concern.
>> When we were young, we don't have many things to concern ourselves with.

We still had another chance, and unless we would be succeeded, we could find other things.
>> We still had another chance, and unless we would succeed, we could find other things.

That's because we were not responsible for my family, and there was nothing to lose.
>> That's because we were not responsible for our  family, and there was nothing to lose.

However, as you know, Dr. MJ and I decided to take a big risk to move our clinic.
>> Correct!

It's a wonderful challenge.
>> Correct!

Now I should get going.
>> Correct!

See you tomorrow.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124310 Christmas to me means a day to play. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 722
124309 What is your opinion about tattoo? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 599
124308 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 554
124307 Homework (12/20) ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1
124306 Speaking of MBTI... ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1
124305 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 0
124304 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 978
124303 Do you like meeting new people? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 955
124302 blind date ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 5
124301 Is the bassist handsome? ^^ Share your answer in a few sentences. ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1
124300 What is the most important thing in your life today? Answer in a... ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1
124299 sorry ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 3
124298 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1
124297 Where is the most amazing place you have been? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 2130
124296 Movie ÀÌ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 5
124295 Describe my future self! ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 750
124294 animals ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 666
124293 Homework 12/20 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 14
124292 19.Dec.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 1
124291 What are you studying these days? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-20 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04