¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Would the world be a safer place without nuclear weapons?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-10-17 2083

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't have to mention about the world without nuclear weapons. I am sure that we can live under the much safer places. Radiation only needs in medical fields and industrial areas which diagnose diseases in human body and inspect proper products. It is true that radiation can help us finding diseases that lead to fast treatment before it becomes more severe. However, if it uses in military purposes, our nations will be disappeared in our planet. We have seen the effect of nuclear weapon in Japan. There are still a lot of people who have been suffering from the side effect of nuclear bomb. Although, some victims are affected far from the middle of explosion, they might have a possibility of cancer because it's special characteristic. There are radiation in anywhere from ground to sky, so humans are exposed to it anytime even though, it is a small amount, there will be some risk of cancer according to the total doses which humans receive. So, we have to try to reduce the dose even in me

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

I don't have to mention about the world without nuclear weapons. 
>> CORRECT! 
I am sure that we can live under the much safer places. 
>> CORRECT! 
Radiation only needs in medical fields and industrial areas which diagnose diseases in human body and inspect proper products. 
>> Radiation is only needed in medical fields and industrial areas which diagnose diseases in human body and inspect proper products. 
It is true that radiation can help us finding diseases that lead to fast treatment before it becomes more severe. 
>> CORRECT! 
However, if it uses in military purposes, our nations will be disappeared in our planet. 
>> However, if it is used for military purposes, our nations will disappear in our planet. 
We have seen the effect of nuclear weapon in Japan. 
>> CORRECT! 
There are still a lot of people who have been suffering from the side effect of nuclear bomb.
>> CORRECT! 
 Although, some victims are affected far from the middle of explosion, they might have a possibility of cancer because it's special characteristic. 
>>  Although, some victims are affected far from the middle of explosion, they might have a possibility of cancer because it has a special characteristic. 
OR >>  Although, some victims are affected far from the middle of explosion, they might have a possibility of cancer because of its special characteristic. 
There are radiation in anywhere from ground to sky, so humans are exposed to it anytime even though, it is a small amount, there will be some risk of cancer according to the total doses which humans receive. 
>> There's radiation in anywhere from ground to sky, so humans are exposed to it anytime; even though it is a small amount, there will be some risk of cancer according to the total doses which humans receive. 
So, we have to try to reduce the dose even in me
>> So, we have to try to reduce the dose even in medications.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121334 What ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 2
121333 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 1
121332 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 389
121331 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 361
121330 Hi Gemmar ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 1421
121329 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 598
121328 2. ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 420
121327 stupid plan ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 435
121326 How older people viewed in yout country? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 2
121325 How are you similar to your parents? How are you different? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 1
121324 How do you overcome fear? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 413
121323 The best way to enjoy reading books. ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 0
121322 want type man ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 1
121321 08.03.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 1
121320 what is my hobby?? ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 4
121319 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 0
121318 Children & News Company Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 2
121317 What do you think is extreme fashion or a fashion that is too... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-08-03 2
121316 What is your favorite movie? Describe it in detail and why you... ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-03 1711
121315 8/3 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-03 475

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04