¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2022-10-15 1804

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Happy Saturday!
How is it going? Is your feeling getting better?
Yesterday, I had a meeting with my friend who is a CEO of interior business.
He worked for the interior of the current clinic, and will work for that of new clinic.
Although he is older than me(10 years), he is so kind and get along with me well.
As we discussed about the interior, we, of course, had some delicious foods with alcohol.
There is a good restaurant which is famous of raw fish near my home and clinic.
I love the raw fish there.
But, Don't worry.
I just had Somaek a little; Somaeg means Soju plus Maekjoo(beer).
Back to the homework, we have to face many risks as we live.
Dr. MJ and I took a risk that we will move to other place for my clinic.
For another example, I bought a house.
Recently, the expense of the house went down.
But, I am sure both of them will be better.
Of course, we must avoid from bad things like gamble.
If we are sure of something, we would better do that, I think.
See you Monday~

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, happy Saturday indeed, Dr. Kim!

Everything's doing great! I emceed a festival today and there were around more than 1,500 people in the park. COVID-19 is really over. Making people happy and enjoying the program is one of my favorite things to do. Right after, me and my son went for samgyeupsal and hang out in the mall. My son scratched lucky tickets and he won a small amount of money, what a lucky day!

Anyway, meeting your CEO friend means that your business is rolling and you really have a very good circle of friends. I hope that your new clinic interior will be comfortable and will attract clients to visit. Meeting a good friend is always the best with sumptuous food and some moderate amount of liquor.

Meanwhile, taking some risks are needed in our lives. While many want to take the safe and comfortable road, there are a few just like you who is brave to take the risk. They say that the higher the risk, the higher the prize. I agree with this. If we dream big, we may succeed big and if our dreams are small, vice versa. You are so courageous together with Dr. MJ. In time, the return of all of your investments will pay off.

Thank you for your well-organized and excellently transitioned ideas. The thoughts of your essay is flowing very smoothly and that is due to your correct grammar and carefully chosen words. In one of your sentences, you used commas so efficiently, awesome job! So, please study carefully some of my suggestions in grammar. 

Have a peaceful rest day tomorrow. Good night!

-T. Donna~

Happy Saturday!
>> Correct!

How is it going? Is your feeling getting better?
>> Correct!

Yesterday, I had a meeting with my friend who is a CEO of interior business.
>> Yesterday, I had a meeting with my friend who is a CEO of an interior business.

He worked for the interior of the current clinic, and will work for that of new clinic.
>> He worked for the interior of the current clinic, and will work for that of the new clinic.

Although he is older than me(10 years), he is so kind and get along with me well.
>> Although he is older than me(10 years), he is so kind and gets along with me well.

As we discussed about the interior, we, of course, had some delicious foods with alcohol.
>> Correct! Perfect use of commas! 

There is a good restaurant which is famous of raw fish near my home and clinic.
>> There is a good restaurant which is famous for raw fish near my home and clinic.

I love the raw fish there.
>> Correct!

But, Don't worry.
>> Correct!
Or: But, don't worry.
Or: Don't worry.

I just had Somaek a little; Somaeg means Soju plus Maekjoo(beer).
>> Correct!
Or: I just had a little Somaek; Somaeg means Soju plus Maekjoo (beer).

Back to the homework, we have to face many risks as we live.
>> Correct!

Dr. MJ and I took a risk that we will move to other place for my clinic.
>> Correct!

For another example, I bought a house.
>> Correct!

Recently, the expense of the house went down.
>> Correct!

But, I am sure both of them will be better.
>> Correct!

Of course, we must avoid from bad things like gamble.
>> Of course, we must avoid bad things like gambling.

If we are sure of something, we would better do that, I think.
>> Correct!

See you Monday~
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124874 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-14 524
124873 Who is your life mentor and why? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-01-14 487
124872 Make sentences using \'house\'. ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 1
124871 If you were a fashion item, what would you be and why? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 2
124870 Write a short essay about students and use the vocabulary words... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 5
124869 How would you react if your friend told you that your boyfriend... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 2
124868 I am ¡®house and home¡¯ person ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 706
124867 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 864
124866 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 2159
124865 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 626
124864 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 693
124863 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 708
124862 Where would you like to go on vacation? Why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 653
124861 What is the greatest challenge you have faced this month? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 767
124860 Answer : What was a good decision you made in the past? Á¤*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 733
124859 What is the impact of movies in our life? ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 535
124858 Life without music¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 500
124857 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 0
124856 Can you tell me about a strange dream you had? ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 0
124855 How much do you value your time? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-13 620

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04