¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you ever feel like you are just wasting your time? What activities do you think are not worth you

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¼·
2022-10-13 5995

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When I was a student, most of time I used to play the computer game. If I think about it now, it's a waste of time. If I couldn't do it, for me to make a lot of memories with my important people.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for your answer to this homework, Elic. Nice effort, and thank you as well for sharing something personal. There were just some misplaced words in some sentences, take note of where I placed them in the corrections that I gave. I also added a few words to complete the thought of some sentences. Other than those, you did quite a good job! Keep it up, my bright student! :)

- Teacher Raven 


When I was a student, most of time I used to play the computer game.
>> When I was a student, I spend most of my time playing computer games.
If I think about it now, it's a waste of time.
>> Correct.
If I couldn't do it, for me to make a lot of memories with my important people. 
>> If I didn't do that, I would've made a lot of memories with the important people in my life.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
127035 Who are you most proud of among your relatives? Who do you look... õ*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-30 1
127034 If you won a million dollars what things would you change about... Àå*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-03-30 1132
127033 What do you think is the worst crime a person could commit? Why? Àå*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-03-30 1099
127032 execution ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-30 885
127031 Networking ±Ç*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-30 3
127030 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-03-30 950
127029 Kinship and friendship ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-30 1669
127028 Smiling!! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-30 2043
127027 Homework ¿ì*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-30 1045
127026 What is an ideal family life like for you? õ*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-30 1
127025 my dream job is adventurer À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-03-30 1172
127024 Homework ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 1048
127023 HOMEWORK FOR 03/29 Á¶*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 1
127022 Home work ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 1
127021 The complaints ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 722
127020 HOMRWORK ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 1
127019 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 732
127018 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 1
127017 Do you think taking a nap can help you gain more energy to... ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 2
127016 How do you keep a fun and friendly conversation with people you... ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-03-29 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04