¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you ever feel like you are just wasting your time? What activities do you think are not worth you

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¼·
2022-10-13 6354

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When I was a student, most of time I used to play the computer game. If I think about it now, it's a waste of time. If I couldn't do it, for me to make a lot of memories with my important people.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for your answer to this homework, Elic. Nice effort, and thank you as well for sharing something personal. There were just some misplaced words in some sentences, take note of where I placed them in the corrections that I gave. I also added a few words to complete the thought of some sentences. Other than those, you did quite a good job! Keep it up, my bright student! :)

- Teacher Raven 


When I was a student, most of time I used to play the computer game.
>> When I was a student, I spend most of my time playing computer games.
If I think about it now, it's a waste of time.
>> Correct.
If I couldn't do it, for me to make a lot of memories with my important people. 
>> If I didn't do that, I would've made a lot of memories with the important people in my life.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130770 3 ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 2057
130769 WRITING TASK: How can role models help us? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 2
130768 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 1948
130767 homework ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 2
130766 What¡¯s the best and worst news you¡¯ve received over the phone? ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 1
130765 When was the last time you felt like you didn\'t want to... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 1875
130764 Do you think some cafes are overpriced? How can you say so? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 2828
130763 Is it safe to believe a pharmacist at all times? Why or why not ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 3453
130762 05.Sep.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 3
130761 What do you know about the human heart? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 2
130760 In the exam! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 2909
130759 9/4 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-05 2148
130758 8-31 homework ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1
130757 What do you do to encourage yourself during hard times? Is it... ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 2355
130756 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1747
130755 What do you think are the most important qualities for a... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1
130754 Homework Àü*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 9
130753 What do you usually do on New Year\'s Day? È«*±â ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 2035
130752 Introduction our things ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 1823
130751 Can you talk about what a typical day at your current job is... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-04 4

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04