¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Wednesday Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2022-10-12 1633

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q: Many countries are facing the problem of an "aging population", meaning there will soon be more old people than young people. What problems will this cause?
A: I think aging population will cause the decrease of workers.
Workers should be strong, but if many countries are facing the problem of an aging population, then the workers can be decrease.
Also, if the aging population continues, then the total population can be decrease too.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


I think aging population will cause the decrease of workers.

>> I think the aging population will cause the decrease of workers.
Workers should be strong, but if many countries are facing the problem of an aging population, then the workers can be decrease.

>> Workers should be strong, but if many countries are facing the problem of an aging population, then the number of workers can decrease.
Also, if the aging population continues, then the total population can be decrease too.

>> Also, if the aging population continues, then the total population will decrease too.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122636 Do you think your test scores reflect your true ability and... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 1200
122635 What are the advantages and disadvantages of being a queen? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 2782
122634 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 3
122633 Use the following phrases in creative sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 1744
122632 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 2
122631 Do you think children today are under more pressure? Why or why... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 1301
122630 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 1429
122629 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 905
122628 difficult ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 1
122627 What is your favorite song? Please tell me its message. ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 2
122626 What is secondhand stress? ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 2
122625 Hi Gemmar ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 3522
122624 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 1
122623 What is the worst season in your country? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 1
122622 9/27 homewokr À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 1245
122621 Travel Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 0
122620 Once someone said \"When you forgive, you in no way change the... Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 3
122619 Is it better to go to popular tourist destinations or lesser... Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 2
122618 What are some things you should do for a job interview? How... Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-09-27 1354
122617 test ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-26 1165

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04