¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Wednesday Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2022-10-12 1839

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q: Many countries are facing the problem of an "aging population", meaning there will soon be more old people than young people. What problems will this cause?
A: I think aging population will cause the decrease of workers.
Workers should be strong, but if many countries are facing the problem of an aging population, then the workers can be decrease.
Also, if the aging population continues, then the total population can be decrease too.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


I think aging population will cause the decrease of workers.

>> I think the aging population will cause the decrease of workers.
Workers should be strong, but if many countries are facing the problem of an aging population, then the workers can be decrease.

>> Workers should be strong, but if many countries are facing the problem of an aging population, then the number of workers can decrease.
Also, if the aging population continues, then the total population can be decrease too.

>> Also, if the aging population continues, then the total population will decrease too.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125096 What is the best way to deal with feelings of anger? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 596
125095 What do you worry about getting older? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 585
125094 What do you think when you look at yourself in the mirror? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 538
125093 What is your favorite Seollal Holiday memory? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 564
125092 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 2
125091 I want to spend the old stage with family ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 1
125090 Do you think that teachers should use corporal punishment as a... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 3752
125089 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 950
125088 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 2
125087 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 769
125086 It`s quiet ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 1
125085 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 1
125084 The creating ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 1
125083 1. What is the USA most famous for? 2. What do you think about... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 2
125082 25.Jan.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 1
125081 Which greeting kind of annoys you? ¹Ú*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 696
125080 Is it okay for other people not to have a bucket list? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 5
125079 1/25 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 691
125078 2023-1/25 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-26 580
125077 What are you most afraid of? Why? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-25 888

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04