¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think bullying should be made a crime or is it part of growing up?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-10-11 1848

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Children must have a lot of experiences before they become an adult because people usually have matured after hard time. However, school bullying is not right thing whcih students must experience. Many students have complained of mental problem and physical pain too. It sometimes leads to teenager's suicide. Bullying exists various forms - mental, physical and cyber bullying. I don't think that punishment with the law is the right solution because we have already studied it in our life. The crime rate has not been decreasing, although there are many method to punish criminals. Students, teachers and parents have to aware how they feel. Most students who have experienced bullying feel anxiety every time. Adults might not understand their psychological status because they consider it as a light problem. It is not easy to solve this issue but if all people try to solve the problem, we can solve the problem.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

Children must have a lot of experiences before they become an adult because people usually have matured after hard time. 
>> CORRECT! 
However, school bullying is not right thing whcih students must experience. 
>> However, school bullying is not a right thing which students must experience. 
Many students have complained of mental problem and physical pain too. 
>> CORRECT! 
It sometimes leads to teenager's suicide. 
>> CORRECT! 
Bullying exists various forms - mental, physical and cyber bullying. 
>> Bullying exists in various forms - mental, physical and cyber bullying. 
I don't think that punishment with the law is the right solution because we have already studied it in our life. 
>> CORRECT! 
The crime rate has not been decreasing, although there are many method to punish criminals.
>> The crime rate has not been decreasing, although there are many methods to punish criminals.
Students, teachers and parents have to aware how they feel. 
>> Students, teachers, and parents have to be aware of how they feel. 
Most students who have experienced bullying feel anxiety every time. 
>> Most students who have experienced bullying feel anxious every time. 
Adults might not understand their psychological status because they consider it as a light problem.
>> CORRECT! 
 It is not easy to solve this issue but if all people try to solve the problem, we can solve the problem.
>> CORRECT! 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122722 Why do we forget dreams so quickly? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-01 1112
122721 10/1 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-01 1937
122720 Weekend ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 1102
122719 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 1643
122718 What are the worst things you can do during the weekend if you... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 1421
122717 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 3
122716 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 1789
122715 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 0
122714 Use the following words in sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 4780
122713 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 1
122712 Which type of people do you find adorable? Cite at least one... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 1959
122711 donation ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 1536
122710 Do you agree that the CoVid-19 pandemic will soon end? Why or... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 2503
122709 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 2
122708 Homework~~ ¹Ú*Çü ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 1530
122707 . ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 1554
122706 HW! ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 1728
122705 Why do people celebrate their birthdays? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 1644
122704 Do you shop for new clothes when the season changes? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-30 1
122703 Play ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 1591

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04