¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think bullying should be made a crime or is it part of growing up?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-10-11 1873

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Children must have a lot of experiences before they become an adult because people usually have matured after hard time. However, school bullying is not right thing whcih students must experience. Many students have complained of mental problem and physical pain too. It sometimes leads to teenager's suicide. Bullying exists various forms - mental, physical and cyber bullying. I don't think that punishment with the law is the right solution because we have already studied it in our life. The crime rate has not been decreasing, although there are many method to punish criminals. Students, teachers and parents have to aware how they feel. Most students who have experienced bullying feel anxiety every time. Adults might not understand their psychological status because they consider it as a light problem. It is not easy to solve this issue but if all people try to solve the problem, we can solve the problem.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

Children must have a lot of experiences before they become an adult because people usually have matured after hard time. 
>> CORRECT! 
However, school bullying is not right thing whcih students must experience. 
>> However, school bullying is not a right thing which students must experience. 
Many students have complained of mental problem and physical pain too. 
>> CORRECT! 
It sometimes leads to teenager's suicide. 
>> CORRECT! 
Bullying exists various forms - mental, physical and cyber bullying. 
>> Bullying exists in various forms - mental, physical and cyber bullying. 
I don't think that punishment with the law is the right solution because we have already studied it in our life. 
>> CORRECT! 
The crime rate has not been decreasing, although there are many method to punish criminals.
>> The crime rate has not been decreasing, although there are many methods to punish criminals.
Students, teachers and parents have to aware how they feel. 
>> Students, teachers, and parents have to be aware of how they feel. 
Most students who have experienced bullying feel anxiety every time. 
>> Most students who have experienced bullying feel anxious every time. 
Adults might not understand their psychological status because they consider it as a light problem.
>> CORRECT! 
 It is not easy to solve this issue but if all people try to solve the problem, we can solve the problem.
>> CORRECT! 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123361 Homework both yesterday and today ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 1704
123360 Do you like cities or the countryside? Which is better and why? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 2334
123359 What is the appropriate age to start dating? Why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 1974
123358 About Halloween ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 1444
123357 Voting is free for the citizen ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 0
123356 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 0
123355 They have to get homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 0
123354 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 0
123353 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 0
123352 If you are very busy at work or at school, do you have ways to... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 1498
123351 If possible, I want to learn English according to the teacher\'s... ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 1594
123350 Hi teacher ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 1
123349 What challenges must society face when dealing with accidents,... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 1765
123348 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 1
123347 Do you think the weather affects how we feel? ½Å*°ü ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 5
123346 In 5 sentences, please write your expectations from the class... ¼±* ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 1389
123345 Describe a person who contributes to the society. ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 1
123344 What\'s your favorite toy? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 1
123343 11.01.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 2
123342 Would you rather be smart or beautiful / handsome? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-11-02 931

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04