¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2022-10-10 2706

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello.
Although many clinics around us decided to do day-off because today is a replaced holiday, I worked in my clinic today.
There were not too many clients, so I could do paper works instead of seeing patients all day.
Meanwhile, there was a bad news.
A marketing manager who has an important role in our clinic told me that she wanted to resign just before.
She has a loyalty and is good at every work in the clinic.
So, this is a big problem.
I tried to turn her mind back, and she got better, not 100%.
Maybe, Dr. MJ and I have to solve this problem tomorrow.
In this situation, I really miss the whiskey, raw fish, and intestine food.
However, I can't eat them because of my diet.
Only what I can do is looking forward to next cheat day.
Anyway, I think today's homework is about a responsibility of rich people to others.
I heard that some CEO or entertainer gave much money to facilities for poor people.
I think that was honorable.
And I want to be such a nice man someday.
See you soon.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Dr. Geun Woo!

I wish for you and Dr. MJ to both have a very smooth day in spite of all the challenges of the exodus of your employees. Since it is becoming quite the trend lately, your contingency must be focused on making your rmployees satisfied. If they want to leave, then you need to have a very good replacement ASAP. This way, your team doesn't feel crippled. Anyway,  I will not be surprised if you will take a shot of whiskey when these things happen.

Now, rich people have more capabilities to help the poor by giving them the chance to educate themselves and make their lives better. Like Bill Gates who created so many foundations to improve lives of people, you too can be one of the doctors who will give comfort to the lives of those in need. It is a nobel way to give back to the society the gift we have received.

This composition is great. The grammar suggestions are more on the correct use of the article 'a' and some word arrangement to create a very clear message. So, keep it upw ith your great skill in composition!

See you soon.

-T. Donna~

Hello.
>> Correct!

Although many clinics around us decided to do day-off because today is a replaced holiday, I worked in my clinic today.
>> Although many clinics around us decided to do a day-off because today is a replaced holiday, I worked in my clinic today.

There were not too many clients, so I could do paper works instead of seeing patients all day.
>> Correct!

Meanwhile, there was a bad news.
>> Correct!

A marketing manager who has an important role in our clinic told me that she wanted to resign just before.
>> Correct!
Or: A marketing manager who has an important role in our clinic told me that she wanted to resign.

She has a loyalty and is good at every work in the clinic.
>> She has loyalty and is good at every work in the clinic.

So, this is a big problem.
>> Correct!

I tried to turn her mind back, and she got better, not 100%.
>>  Correct!
Or: I tried to turn her mind back and she got better but not 100%.

Maybe, Dr. MJ and I have to solve this problem tomorrow.
>> Correct!

In this situation, I really miss the whiskey, raw fish, and intestine food.
>> Correct!

However, I can't eat them because of my diet.
>> Correct!

Only what I can do is looking forward to next cheat day.
>>  What I can only do is looking forward to next cheat day.

Anyway, I think today's homework is about a responsibility of rich people to others.
>> Anyway, I think today's homework is about the responsibility of rich people to others.

I heard that some CEO or entertainer gave much money to facilities for poor people.
>> Correct!

I think that was honorable.
>> Correct!
Or: 
I think that is honorable.

And I want to be such a nice man someday.
>> Correct!

See you soon.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129162 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-29 0
129161 HOMEWORK FOR 06.28.2023 Á¤*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-29 2750
129160 Let me introduce myself ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-29 2626
129159 My high school life ±è*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-06-29 3473
129158 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-06-29 1
129157 media ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-29 3964
129156 HOMEWORK FOR 06.27.2023 Á¤*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-29 3483
129155 HOMEWORK FOR 06.29.2023 Á¤*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-29 3086
129154 28.Jan.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-29 1
129153 What will you do this weekend? ÀÌ*½Â ¿Ï·á 2023-06-29 1
129152 DIRECTIONS: Use the following words in a sentence: ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-29 6
129151 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-29 2035
129150 What are the best ways to prevent misunderstandings? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 2
129149 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 2127
129148 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 2119
129147 If a handsome guy keeps flirting with you, would you consider... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 5
129146 What do you enjoy doing during the summer season? Á¶*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 2746
129145 homework 06.28 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 4751
129144 What do you like doing with your friends? °­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1355
129143 Can you Kiki ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 2590

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04