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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Homework

작성자: 김*우
2022-10-08 2437

회원님의 영작문

Happy Saturday!
What did you do today?
As I told you, I had a cheat day.
I ate a grilled pork(named Samgyeopsal) and a special soup composed of intestine, shrimp, and small octopus.
Of course, I also drank a whiskey that is named "Johnnie Walker".
After that, I ate a melon.
And that's why I am full now.
Before I had these foods, I helped my second daughter ride a bicycle that has only two wheels.
She was afraid of falling down, but she could ride so well.
Maybe, she will ride a bike better next time.
At workplace, I fired one staff today.
That's because she didn't get along with other staffs.
She admitted her faults and asked us to forgive her.
However, we couldn't turn it back, because of other staffs.
She asked me to give her a second chance someday.
Since she was passionate, diligent and always kind to clients, I felt so bad about this situation.
Back to my homework, I think I am a helpful person.
My friends and my family said that.
I think you are such a person, too.
See you.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Dr. Kim! Good evening!

Yesterday, I went to the radio in the morning and I emceed a doctor and an engineer's wedding in the evening. This morning, I was a tad bit exhausted but I went to the radio, made some meatballs and fried some fish for lunch, and cleaned my house. I am tired but I am very happy, thanks for asking. 

You seemed to have a very exquisite cheat day! I like the soup you had in particular. Johnnie Walker is my father's favorite, the Black Label. I hope that you savored all of your food and drinks because diet week is back again tomorrow. 

Meanwhile, firing someone may be cruel for some but then, under quality control, it is sometimes executed to make an organization or a workplace operate better. Since you have already made the rules, guidelines, and policies clear, no one should commit mistakes again. Unfortunately,  another did and you have to apply the punishment. Hope that next week will be better.

If most people ask for your help every now and then, that means that you are someone they can count on. Being helpful is not easy because most of us are selfish and would rather be comfortable helping ourselves. If we are able to give a hand, that means we are sharing our skills and our precious time for no expected return or favor. In my case, I help people who really needs help. Some people pretend to need help, while others ask too much of it. In short, being wise in helping others help themselves solve their own problems is better than helping them always.

Your sentences had a very high percentage of correct grammar patterns. It is very interesting and amusing to read and honest in thoughts. Great job for this homework. As always, kindly go over the grammar suggestions in some of the sentences.

See you in class!

-T. Donna~

Happy Saturday!
>> Correct!

What did you do today?
>> Correct!

As I told you, I had a cheat day.
>> Correct!

I ate a grilled pork(named Samgyeopsal) and a special soup composed of intestine, shrimp, and small octopus.
>> Correct!

Of course, I also drank a whiskey that is named "Johnnie Walker".
>> Of course, I also drank whiskey named "Johnnie Walker".

After that, I ate a melon.
>> After that, I ate melon.

And that's why I am full now.
>> Correct!

Before I had these foods, I helped my second daughter ride a bicycle that has only two wheels.
>> Correct!

She was afraid of falling down, but she could ride so well.
>> Correct!

Maybe, she will ride a bike better next time.
>> Correct!

At workplace, I fired one staff today.
>> Correct!

That's because she didn't get along with other staffs.
>> Correct!
Or: staff

She admitted her faults and asked us to forgive her.
>> Correct!

However, we couldn't turn it back, because of other staffs.
>> However, we couldn't turn it back, because of the other staff.

She asked me to give her a second chance someday.
>> Correct!

Since she was passionate, diligent and always kind to clients, I felt so bad about this situation.
>> Correct!
Or: Since she was passionate, diligent, and always kind to clients, I felt so bad about this situation.

Back to my homework, I think I am a helpful person.
>> Correct!

My friends and my family said that.
>> Correct!

I think you are such a person, too.
>> I think you are such person too.

See you.
>> Correct!

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