¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2022-10-06 2322

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hi.
It's already Thursday, weekend is coming.
In my clinic today, there was no serious problem.
One of staffs quitted though.
It's alright.
Maybe I seem to get used to this situation.
Meanwhile, I had job interviews with two people, and Dr. MJ and I were satisfied with their attitude and experience, so we decided to let them join us.
I think there are so many people that will do good at my clinic.
Thus, I try to not worry about staffs.
In today's interview, a volunteer had a good impression; polite greeting, formal clothes, adequate smile, wise question, soft voice, and good eye contact.
Those elements are important in any first meeting.
Hence, we should try to have those things, if we want to make our first impression better.
In addition, listening to someone carefully is also important.
Because most people like to talk about themselves.
It's not difficult to listen to other.
And I think listening is so effective to get a mind.
My car is calling me, so I gotta go.
Catch you tomorrow.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there, Dr. Kim!

I wish you all the best in your clinic today. Since you spend most of your waking hours there with your staff and Dr. MJ, maintaining positive and amibale relations is the best way to communicate with each other, most especially to your patients' needs.

All of us want to make the perfect first impression. Sometimes, people focus so much on their looks while other, prepare for their thoughts. When you do the latter, you just have to look fine. Meanwhile, others are just exceptional by being so captivating and memorable- this is once in a blue moon. Nevertheless, being respectful and having a sound personality are are still the basic elements of a great first impression.

Your homework had the perfect transition from one idea to another. Your style is impeccable and your grammar is getting better all the time. Carry on with your wise work and diligenc always.

See you on the next composition!

Have an enjoyable weekend!

-T. Donna~

Hi.
>> Correct!

It's already Thursday, weekend is coming.
>> Correct!

In my clinic today, there was no serious problem.
>> Correct!

One of staffs quitted though.
It's alright.
>> Correct!

Maybe I seem to get used to this situation.
>> Correct! 
Or:  Maybe, I seem to get used to this situation. (Add a comma.)

Meanwhile, I had job interviews with two people, and Dr. MJ and I were satisfied with their attitude and experience, so we decided to let them join us.
>> Correct!

I think there are so many people that will do good at my clinic.
>> Correct!

Thus, I try to not worry about staffs.
>> Thus, I try not to worry about our staff.

In today's interview, a volunteer had a good impression; polite greeting, formal clothes, adequate smile, wise question, soft voice, and good eye contact. 
>> Correct! 

Those elements are important in any first meeting.
>> Correct!

Hence, we should try to have those things, if we want to make our first impression better.
>> Correct!

In addition, listening to someone carefully is also important.
>> Correct!

Because most people like to talk about themselves.
>> Correct!
Or: This is because most people like to talk about themselves.

It's not difficult to listen to other.
>> It's not difficult to listen to others.

And I think listening is so effective to get a mind.
>> And I think, listening is so effective to know one's mind.

My car is calling me, so I gotta go.
>> Correct!
Or: I got to go. (For formal speech.)

Catch you tomorrow.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125697 Busiest day ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-16 714
125696 The importance of greetings ¹é*¾ð ¿Ï·á 2023-02-16 0
125695 What is the most interesting city to visit in your country? Àå*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-02-16 733
125694 Homework from the Feedback (13) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-16 701
125693 homework ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-16 598
125692 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-02-16 1
125691 When I am alone ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-16 997
125690 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-16 529
125689 2023-2/15 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 2172
125688 What do you do when you have trouble sleeping? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 693
125687 We have to practice how to read efficiently ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 0
125686 homework 02.15 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 771
125685 What\'s your thought on the death penalty as punishment for a... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 2
125684 Peer pressure is just a fact of life. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 981
125683 HOMEWORK È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 5
125682 homework. ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 860
125681 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 830
125680 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 1769
125679 homework ½Å*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 3
125678 letter ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-15 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04