¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Jennny\'s English composition

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¿ì*¼±
2022-10-04 2320

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Monday i went to the amusement park, with my friends. We rode the subway. And we Arrived at pm12. We first rode commet express. We rode twice! It was funny. And we ate dinner, we rode Viking. It was scared. And we go to ghost house. It was very very scared.After than I cried.And we rode Teacup. I died for so feel dizzy..And we watch Halloween parade.it was so fantastic. And we road wild vally,wild wing and fiy venture,too. And go to the home at pm 8;30. IT was so fun,I want to go my friends again.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Jenny! ^_^ Thank you so much for sharing your wonderful experience with your friends. ^^ I sure hope you get to hang out with them again~ ^^
~T.Harmony

Monday i went to the amusement park, with my friends.
>> My friends and I went to an amusement park last Monday.
We rode the subway.
>> CORRECT!
And we Arrived at pm12.
>> We arrived at our destination at 12 noon.
We first rode commet express.
>> We first rode the Comet Express. 
We rode twice! 
>> We actually went on that ride twice!
It was funny.
>> CORRECT!
And we ate dinner, we rode Viking.
>> We had dinner before getting on the Viking.
It was scared.
>> It was scary.
And we go to ghost house.
>> We then went to a ghost house.
It was very very scared.
>> It was very frightening.
After than I cried.
>> I cried after that.
And we rode Teacup.
>> We also rode the Teacup.
I died for so feel dizzy.
>> I could almost pass out from the nausea I felt.
And we watch Halloween parade.
>> We watched a Halloween parade together.
It was so fantastic. 
>> CORRECT!
And we road wild vally,wild wing and fiy venture,too.
>> We rode the Wild Valley, Wild Wing and Fly Venture as well.
And go to the home at pm 8;30.
>> We decided to go home at 8:30PM.
IT was so fun, I want to go my friends again.
>> We had a lot of fun, and I hope to return to that amusement park with my friends.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117987 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-05 702
117986 Do you think you are now successful, or still unsuccessful? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-05 204
117985 What is your opinion about people who have tattoos? Would you... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-04-05 355
117984 Why I like the stars more than the sun. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 296
117983 Why are some sports fans so passionate? : 1. under a lot of... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 2
117982 What I did when I go to supermarket last weekend. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 337
117981 Why I think homework is important ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 362
117980 Writing Task (Apr 4th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 603
117979 4/4 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 297
117978 Tattoo ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 442
117977 Do you always make specific plans on weekends? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 341
117976 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 1
117975 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 2
117974 Do you think it would be harder to live with a physical... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 528
117973 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 2
117972 What other ways can you think of to stand the heat? ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 397
117971 Do you think people feel different when they wear different... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 371
117970 Mentally distressed ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 4
117969 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 431
117968 What do you think is the most serious problem in the world? Why... ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-04 429

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04