¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Jennny\'s English composition

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¿ì*¼±
2022-10-04 1881

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Monday i went to the amusement park, with my friends. We rode the subway. And we Arrived at pm12. We first rode commet express. We rode twice! It was funny. And we ate dinner, we rode Viking. It was scared. And we go to ghost house. It was very very scared.After than I cried.And we rode Teacup. I died for so feel dizzy..And we watch Halloween parade.it was so fantastic. And we road wild vally,wild wing and fiy venture,too. And go to the home at pm 8;30. IT was so fun,I want to go my friends again.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Jenny! ^_^ Thank you so much for sharing your wonderful experience with your friends. ^^ I sure hope you get to hang out with them again~ ^^
~T.Harmony

Monday i went to the amusement park, with my friends.
>> My friends and I went to an amusement park last Monday.
We rode the subway.
>> CORRECT!
And we Arrived at pm12.
>> We arrived at our destination at 12 noon.
We first rode commet express.
>> We first rode the Comet Express. 
We rode twice! 
>> We actually went on that ride twice!
It was funny.
>> CORRECT!
And we ate dinner, we rode Viking.
>> We had dinner before getting on the Viking.
It was scared.
>> It was scary.
And we go to ghost house.
>> We then went to a ghost house.
It was very very scared.
>> It was very frightening.
After than I cried.
>> I cried after that.
And we rode Teacup.
>> We also rode the Teacup.
I died for so feel dizzy.
>> I could almost pass out from the nausea I felt.
And we watch Halloween parade.
>> We watched a Halloween parade together.
It was so fantastic. 
>> CORRECT!
And we road wild vally,wild wing and fiy venture,too.
>> We rode the Wild Valley, Wild Wing and Fly Venture as well.
And go to the home at pm 8;30.
>> We decided to go home at 8:30PM.
IT was so fun, I want to go my friends again.
>> We had a lot of fun, and I hope to return to that amusement park with my friends.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121076 I disagree with this quote. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 818
121075 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 221
121074 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 237
121073 What was the last piece of good news you heard? ä*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 234
121072 To minimize the use of plastic Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 2
121071 Do you think school trips are popular? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 547
121070 the pros and cons of both husband and wife working ³ë*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 268
121069 What was your favorite concert? Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 441
121068 Homework ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 419
121067 What do you think about the health care system in your country?... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 732
121066 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 0
121065 What kinds of jobs do you think robots can do already? How would... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 512
121064 A Thank you letter -5Dhomeroom teacher ±Ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 233
121063 Hi Gemmar ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 241
121062 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 1
121061 Playing ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 1
121060 homework Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 555
121059 What concerns do you have about food? What are your ¡®rules of... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 2208
121058 Would you recommend that a friend take a cruise? Why or why not? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 274
121057 What is your favorite music? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-26 5

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04