¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

10/3

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2022-10-03 2225

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I have lived in Seoul since I was born.
I like Seoul very much and I want to stay for good in Seoul.
Actually, I enjoy traveling around the world.
It's so exciting to learn about other cultures and share local food.
However, when staying in other country for several days, I miss Seoul life, Korean food, and Korean environement.
Sometimes, experiencing new cultures give me inspiration, but familiarity is the best thing to give me comfort and cozy.
My family and friends live in Seoul, so I'm not lonely in Seoul.
Because I'm accustomed to Seoul's direction, I could find anything and enjoy many things.
Since I'm good at Korean, I have no problem in communicating with other people and easily get help from other people.
For these reasons, I'm planning to live in Seoul after I retire.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Dr. Stella!

Seoul is the place to be! It seems like everything that you are looking for a place to stay are already available in your city. Then, be it Seoul.

Your composition has so many supporting details to explain your choice. Apparently, you can go on and on with your list. Also, your comparison of travel to anothe country makes your answer even well established that there is no place like your home, Seoul.

Thus, try to go over the grammar suggestions on a few of your sentences and study them carefully. Thank you for your consistent hard work and effort in writing! You are gettn better each time. Way to go!

-T. Donna~
I have lived in Seoul since I was born.
>> Correct!

I like Seoul very much and I want to stay for good in Seoul.
>> Correct!

Actually, I enjoy traveling around the world.
>> Correct!

It's so exciting to learn about other cultures and share local food.
>> Correct!

However, when staying in other country for several days, I miss Seoul life, Korean food, and Korean environement.
>> However, when staying in another country for several days, I miss Seoul life; Korean food and the Korean environement.

Sometimes, experiencing new cultures give me inspiration, but familiarity is the best thing to give me comfort and cozy.
>> Sometimes, experiencing new cultures give me inspiration, but familiarity is the best thing to give me comfort and coziness.

My family and friends live in Seoul, so I'm not lonely in Seoul.
>> Correct!

Because I'm accustomed to Seoul's direction, I could find anything and enjoy many things.
>> Correct!

Since I'm good at Korean, I have no problem in communicating with other people and easily get help from other people.
>> Correct!
Or: Since I'm good at Korean, I have no problem in communicating with other people and I could easily get help from other people.

For these reasons, I'm planning to live in Seoul after I retire.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125030 I think people who collect insects or have them as pets are¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 618
125029 mt favorite genre ¹Ú*º° ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 623
125028 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 538
125027 Homework from the Feedback (2) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 793
125026 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 517
125025 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 701
125024 How important are student evaluations on teachers? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 4
125023 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 507
125022 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 1
125021 They are free to use their money ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 0
125020 A bug¡¯s life! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 710
125019 Talk about your best memory from a holiday. ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 733
125018 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 3
125017 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 10
125016 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 0
125015 I think that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 918
125014 Is domestic violence a big problem in your country? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 559
125013 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 487
125012 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 526
125011 holiday ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-01-20 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04