¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

10/3

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2022-10-03 2387

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I have lived in Seoul since I was born.
I like Seoul very much and I want to stay for good in Seoul.
Actually, I enjoy traveling around the world.
It's so exciting to learn about other cultures and share local food.
However, when staying in other country for several days, I miss Seoul life, Korean food, and Korean environement.
Sometimes, experiencing new cultures give me inspiration, but familiarity is the best thing to give me comfort and cozy.
My family and friends live in Seoul, so I'm not lonely in Seoul.
Because I'm accustomed to Seoul's direction, I could find anything and enjoy many things.
Since I'm good at Korean, I have no problem in communicating with other people and easily get help from other people.
For these reasons, I'm planning to live in Seoul after I retire.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Dr. Stella!

Seoul is the place to be! It seems like everything that you are looking for a place to stay are already available in your city. Then, be it Seoul.

Your composition has so many supporting details to explain your choice. Apparently, you can go on and on with your list. Also, your comparison of travel to anothe country makes your answer even well established that there is no place like your home, Seoul.

Thus, try to go over the grammar suggestions on a few of your sentences and study them carefully. Thank you for your consistent hard work and effort in writing! You are gettn better each time. Way to go!

-T. Donna~
I have lived in Seoul since I was born.
>> Correct!

I like Seoul very much and I want to stay for good in Seoul.
>> Correct!

Actually, I enjoy traveling around the world.
>> Correct!

It's so exciting to learn about other cultures and share local food.
>> Correct!

However, when staying in other country for several days, I miss Seoul life, Korean food, and Korean environement.
>> However, when staying in another country for several days, I miss Seoul life; Korean food and the Korean environement.

Sometimes, experiencing new cultures give me inspiration, but familiarity is the best thing to give me comfort and cozy.
>> Sometimes, experiencing new cultures give me inspiration, but familiarity is the best thing to give me comfort and coziness.

My family and friends live in Seoul, so I'm not lonely in Seoul.
>> Correct!

Because I'm accustomed to Seoul's direction, I could find anything and enjoy many things.
>> Correct!

Since I'm good at Korean, I have no problem in communicating with other people and easily get help from other people.
>> Correct!
Or: Since I'm good at Korean, I have no problem in communicating with other people and I could easily get help from other people.

For these reasons, I'm planning to live in Seoul after I retire.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120015 Some people feel unsafe either staying at home or going out.... ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 0
120014 What do you shop for always? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 2
120013 Do you think getting old is a good thing or a bad thing? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 403
120012 How do you keep in touch with your relatives and friends? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 484
120011 Why do you think former president Moon Jae-in¡¯s nuclear... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 467
120010 6/20 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 672
120009 What is your opinion of ¡°job security¡±? How do you define... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 540
120008 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 574
120007 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 2
120006 Do you want a busy leisure time or a relaxed one? Answer in a... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 909
120005 Do you prefer living in the city or in the country? Why? Do you... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 727
120004 favorite place in my city ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 783
120003 RSVP ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 644
120002 Are there any activities that you used to do but don\'t do... ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 1
120001 Describe the best hotel that you have ever stayed at? ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 2
120000 self introduction ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 709
119999 What are your favorite foods for breakfast, lunch and dinner? ÇÑ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 391
119998 homework ¿ø*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 802
119997 John Sculley said•• ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 281
119996 What holiday do you think should be removed from your country... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-20 382

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04