¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

10/3

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2022-10-03 2132

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I have lived in Seoul since I was born.
I like Seoul very much and I want to stay for good in Seoul.
Actually, I enjoy traveling around the world.
It's so exciting to learn about other cultures and share local food.
However, when staying in other country for several days, I miss Seoul life, Korean food, and Korean environement.
Sometimes, experiencing new cultures give me inspiration, but familiarity is the best thing to give me comfort and cozy.
My family and friends live in Seoul, so I'm not lonely in Seoul.
Because I'm accustomed to Seoul's direction, I could find anything and enjoy many things.
Since I'm good at Korean, I have no problem in communicating with other people and easily get help from other people.
For these reasons, I'm planning to live in Seoul after I retire.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Dr. Stella!

Seoul is the place to be! It seems like everything that you are looking for a place to stay are already available in your city. Then, be it Seoul.

Your composition has so many supporting details to explain your choice. Apparently, you can go on and on with your list. Also, your comparison of travel to anothe country makes your answer even well established that there is no place like your home, Seoul.

Thus, try to go over the grammar suggestions on a few of your sentences and study them carefully. Thank you for your consistent hard work and effort in writing! You are gettn better each time. Way to go!

-T. Donna~
I have lived in Seoul since I was born.
>> Correct!

I like Seoul very much and I want to stay for good in Seoul.
>> Correct!

Actually, I enjoy traveling around the world.
>> Correct!

It's so exciting to learn about other cultures and share local food.
>> Correct!

However, when staying in other country for several days, I miss Seoul life, Korean food, and Korean environement.
>> However, when staying in another country for several days, I miss Seoul life; Korean food and the Korean environement.

Sometimes, experiencing new cultures give me inspiration, but familiarity is the best thing to give me comfort and cozy.
>> Sometimes, experiencing new cultures give me inspiration, but familiarity is the best thing to give me comfort and coziness.

My family and friends live in Seoul, so I'm not lonely in Seoul.
>> Correct!

Because I'm accustomed to Seoul's direction, I could find anything and enjoy many things.
>> Correct!

Since I'm good at Korean, I have no problem in communicating with other people and easily get help from other people.
>> Correct!
Or: Since I'm good at Korean, I have no problem in communicating with other people and I could easily get help from other people.

For these reasons, I'm planning to live in Seoul after I retire.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121756 Homework for 19 Aug 2022 ±Ç*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-22 1463
121755 08.19.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-22 1
121754 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-22 676
121753 Do you agree that the K-ETA system should also be applied in... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-21 611
121752 How do you think the people who were affected by this recent... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-21 1189
121751 Since you have been married for a long time, what advice can you... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-08-21 1
121750 What annoys you about the Internet? It makes me annoyed to... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-21 1
121749 Where do you see yourself in 10 years? What are your long-term... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-08-21 538
121748 MY problem ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-21 1
121747 If you could change anything about your present home, what would... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 1056
121746 Does smoking give you a better image or make you look more... ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 1
121745 What do you think are the reasons why so many people care so... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 2
121744 Foods Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 2
121743 What do you want to include in your ideal fitness program? ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 654
121742 super power Á¶*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 976
121741 How would you describe a healthy diet? ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 1351
121740 What do you do to keep fit? ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-20 647
121739 About the reasons for violence before television and video games. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 593
121738 8/19 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 699
121737 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-19 2003

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04