¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2022-09-26 805

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Good evening.
There were bad news today.
One of our staffs have quit.
She joined our clinic a few days ago, and I think she couldn't get used to her position.
However, it is scheduled that new members will join us tomorrow.
So, it will work out.
I really hope so.
Meanwhile, I am on a diet these days.
Thus, I can't eat what I want; For example, whiskey, beer, chicken, ramen, and so on.
Of course, I have a cheating day.
Last Saturday, I ate fried foods, ddocboggi, soondae, grilled fish and wine.
I had a blast, but time flied so fast.
Sadly, I am starving now, because I just ate a tiny pieces of snacks and raw fish for my supper.
Anyway, today's homework is about factors of a handsome guy in my country.
We usually regard that a man with big eyes, small face, long height and six packs is perfect in appearance.
Won-bin, Jung woo sung are the best in appearance, I think.
And I heard that Cha Eun woo is famous for his beautiful appearance among the young people.
You can google it.
See you

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Dr. Kim!

I hope that this Tuesday will be better than yesterday there in your clinic. It is hard to stop people from leaving when they want to but we can always take care of those who want to stay. Good luck to your clinic then.

Doing a diet can be so hard at the start but as our body gets used to a pattern, it adjusts and everything becomes normal. I am sure you will be successful in your fitness journey. I wish you well.

I Googled all of these men you mentioned below and no doubt, they are extremely handsome. Some do not look natural due to their facial perfection but we cannot truly know who among the celebrities had surgery these days. Anyway, it is their job to take care of themselves and look the best.

For your homework answer, it was direct to the point, segmented into parts, and packed with meaning. Keep it up with your journal style in writing. Excellent job!

Please go over my suggestions in grammar as usual.

See you!

-T. Donna~

Good evening.
>> Correct!

There were bad news today.
>> Correct!

One of our staffs have quit.
>> Correct!
Or: One of our staff have quit.

She joined our clinic a few days ago, and I think she couldn't get used to her position.
>> Correct!

However, it is scheduled that new members will join us tomorrow.
So, it will work out.
>> Correct!

I really hope so.
>> Correct!

Meanwhile, I am on a diet these days.
>> Correct!

Thus, I can't eat what I want; For example, whiskey, beer, chicken, ramen, and so on.
>> Correct!
Or: Thus, I can't eat and drinkl what I want; for example, whiskey, beer, chicken, ramen, and so on.

Of course, I have a cheating day.
>> Correct!

Last Saturday, I ate fried foods, ddocboggi, soondae, grilled fish and wine.
>> Correct!

I had a blast, but time flied so fast.
>> I had a blast, but time flew so fast.

Sadly, I am starving now, because I just ate a tiny pieces of snacks and raw fish for my supper.
>> Sadly, I am starving now, because I just ate tiny pieces of snacks and raw fish for my supper.

Anyway, today's homework is about factors of a handsome guy in my country.
>> Correct!

We usually regard that a man with big eyes, small face, long height and six packs is perfect in appearance.
>> Correct!

Won-bin, Jung woo sung are the best in appearance, I think.
>> Correct!

And I heard that Cha Eun woo is famous for his beautiful appearance among the young people.
>> Correct!

You can google it.
>> Correct!
Or: You can Google it.

See you
>> See you.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122450 What do you think of cosmetic surgery? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 2390
122449 9/19 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1620
122448 09.19.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 2
122447 My favorite teacher (*^_^*) ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1587
122446 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 979
122445 What makes you different from everyone else? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1784
122444 Homework ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1049
122443 Oh no .. I knew this was today\'s hw page.. (Sep 19) ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 6
122442 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 0
122441 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 2
122440 What is the best way to make new friends? Do you like making new... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1139
122439 How do you feel after a long vacation. ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1441
122438 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1277
122437 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 0
122436 When you travel, would you rather go to a place where there are... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1074
122435 Monday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 847
122434 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1
122433 Hi Gemmar ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1982
122432 Preparation ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1
122431 Have you ever injured yourself while working out? What happened? ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1003

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04