¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How would you maintain a good relationship with your family if you could only interact online?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2022-09-22 1017

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If I go to other regions in our country, or overseas on business, I could interact with my family only online. Perhaps, I would keep in touch with my family members as much as possible whenever I have spare time to talk with them. However, I wouldn't use it to check whether my children are doing good at school or not, or whether my wife is taking care of mischievous children well or not because my children and my wife may be offended by my spending this limited time foolishly or meaninlessly. We should utilize this precious time to express our love for each other.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Steve!
(^___^)

It's long been taught by the book of love, but now scientists suggest that absence truly does make the heart grow fonder, particularly when it comes to intimacy. Thus; constant communication is a must.

Online communication is often denigrated as a poor replacement of face-to-face time.
It¡¯s a digital world, and to ignore that would be foolish. The chief advantage of online communication is that both geography and time are relatively, if not completely, unimportant.

Thank you so much for this composition.
Have a good day!^^

__T. Mayleen :)


If I go to other regions in our country, or overseas on business, I could interact with my family only online.
>>> If I go to other regions in our country or overseas on business, I can interact with my family only online.
>>> OR: If I go for work to other parts of the county or abroad, I can only communicate with my family online.

Perhaps, I would keep in touch with my family members as much as possible whenever I have spare time to talk with them.
>>> Perhaps, I will keep in touch with my family members as much as possible whenever I have spare time to talk with them.

However, I wouldn't use it to check whether my children are doing good at school or not, or whether my wife is taking care of mischievous children well or not because my children and my wife may be offended by my spending this limited time foolishly or meaninlessly.
>>> However, I wouldn't use it to check whether my children are doing well at school or not, or whether my wife is taking care of our mischievous children well or not, because my children and my wife may be offended by my spending this limited time foolishly or meaninglessly.
>>> OR: However, I wouldn't use it to see if my kids are doing well in school or if my wife is taking good care of our wayward kids since I would anger them by wasting this precious time in a dumb or pointless manner.

We should utilize this precious time to express our love for each other.
>>> CORRECT
>>> OR: We should make the most of this valuable moment by showing each other how much we care.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123536 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 1838
123535 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 1587
123534 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 1505
123533 Is cloning good or bad? Why or why not? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 1478
123532 What new innovations have you noticed nowadays? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 1540
123531 How do you think marriage changes people? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 1
123530 Do you like to try new restaurants, or do you prefer to go to... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 1770
123529 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 1469
123528 seoul ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 0
123527 Do you agree that a society that is not capable of allowing... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 1982
123526 Today ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 2
123525 Was there a greater \"sense of community\" between neighbors in... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 1521
123524 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 1
123523 parents ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 1948
123522 Do you trust everything you hear and see on the news? How can... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 1124
123521 Are you a healthy person? What do you do about it? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 1734
123520 10.Nov.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-11-11 0
123519 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-11-10 2
123518 The best way to live healthy ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-10 0
123517 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-11-10 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04