¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK: If something is annoying you, what do you usually do? Explain your opinion in five sentenc

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿í
2022-09-20 2450

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~T. Annie
HOMEWORK:

There are many obstacles in life, It can be a person, also It can be something. If some situations are matter, I'll just admit it and take all my burdens gladly. what if something is harrassing me, then I'll overcome it by all means. for instance, I ardently eager to eat sushi, although all stores that deal with fishes are closed, even if I end up doing fishing myself, I'll achieve what I want. and Lastly, If someone is annoying me, then I'll seize the all situations and relationships, and I'll presume the results of my actions. after my calculations, I'll do it. It may be a warning, or can be a conciliation. Judging from my experiences, People who needs explain are not likely to change even if I explain it to them. Here's the saying, We can't change yesterday and other people, but we can change our tomorrow. It's depending on the situations, but I'll judge thinking of these things.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Jason, here's my corrections for this homework. I am impressed with how you make your sentences with complete thought. However, please do consider correct punctuation and capitalization. Remember, commas (,) are used for separating thoughts and ideas, while periods (.) are used to end a sentence and remember that every after a period (.) you should start the next sentence with a capital letter. Please review my corrections and also, remember that it's okay to use simple words rather than difficult sounding ones. Keeping sentences simple makes it a lot easier for you to express yourself. You did great today! Thank you very much, Jason! :)

- Teacher Raven 



There are many obstacles in life, It can be a person, also It can be something.
>> There are many obstacles in life, it can be a thing or even a person.
If some situations are matter, I'll just admit it and take all my burdens gladly.
>> If some situations, I'll just admit it and take all my burdens gladly.
what if something is harrassing me, then I'll overcome it by all means.
>> If something is annoying me, I'll overcome it by all means.
for instance, I ardently eager to eat sushi, although all stores that deal with fishes are closed, even if I end up doing fishing myself, I'll achieve what I want.
>> For instance, I was eager to eat sushi, however, the stores which sell fish are closed. If I went fishing myself, I'll achieve what I want.
and Lastly, If someone is annoying me, then I'll seize the all situations and relationships, and I'll presume the results of my actions.
>> Lastly, if someone is annoying me, I'll think about the situation and our relationship and I'll consider the results what I'll be doing.
after my calculations, I'll do it.
>> After carefully thinking about it, I'll consider doing it.
It may be a warning, or can be a conciliation.
>> I can give them a warning or a conciliation between us.
Judging from my experiences, People who needs explain are not likely to change even if I explain it to them.
>> From my experiences, people who ask for explanations are not likely to change even if I did so.
Here's the saying, We can't change yesterday and other people, but we can change our tomorrow.
>> There's a saying that goes like, "We can't change yesterday and other people, but we can change our tomorrow."
It's depending on the situations, but I'll judge thinking of these things.
>> It depends upon the situation, but I'll consider these things when I make my decisions.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118292 Are there any foods that bring back special memories for you? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 171
118291 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 0
118290 What city do you think is the best in South Korea? Explain your... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 0
118289 What is the best memory you have of your family doing something... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 142
118288 What is the best memory you have of your family doing something... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 0
118287 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 76
118286 Sentences ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 108
118285 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 4
118284 worst memory ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 104
118283 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 1
118282 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 145
118281 How do you usually cheer up those people close to you? ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 138
118280 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 2
118279 Are fat people lazy? Tell me your thought. ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 1
118278 homework ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 12
118277 Somking ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 1
118276 Work ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 16
118275 Leave ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 12
118274 N ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 19
118273 What stressful situation did you have in your new company? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-04-17 4

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04