¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Use the following words in simple sentences

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¼·
2022-09-15 1559

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When I got a sadness, I could treat my mood to listen to music like pop, lock and rap songs. Also, I have an aggressive thing to make me calm, if I have trouble things. Thanks for your teaching always kindly.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there, Elic! You're welcome, it's my pleasure to teach you every day. You are such an amazing student and it shows by how well you perform in class. Your progress motivates me to keep teaching and helping a lot of students. :) Please continue what you are doing, never give up on your dreams. Here are some of my corrections, please review them well. Have a nice day! :)


hen I got a sadness, I could treat my mood to listen to music like pop, lock and rap songs.
>> When I feel sadness, I treat myself by listening to pop & lock and rap music.
Also, I have an aggressive thing to make me calm, if I have trouble things.
>> Also, I can be aggressive sometimes when I get into trouble, I try my best to keep calm.
Thanks for your teaching always kindly.
>> Thanks for always teaching me kindly.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123070 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1
123069 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 2
123068 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1991
123067 What is the worst disaster in your opinion? Share your answer in... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 2033
123066 What\'s your birthday wish for me? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1881
123065 Use these words in sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 2125
123064 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 0
123063 What do you think is the worst invention of the mankind?... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 2144
123062 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 2411
123061 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1
123060 Antique shop ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1
123059 Hi Jhozel ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1322
123058 What are some in-demand occupations in your country? Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 2163
123057 10.18.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1
123056 selfishness ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1403
123055 10/18 ¼Û*ö ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1841
123054 What are clouds made of? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1
123053 If you were a celebrity endorser, what product would you promote? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-10-18 1
123052 10.17.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 1
123051 Do you find it easy to explain your feelings to another person?... Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-10-17 2068

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04