¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What puts you in bad mood? What puts you in a good mood? How do you manage your mood?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¼·
2022-09-14 1202

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't need to have nothing else to make good mood during sleep. I need to only long pillow. :) Because I hug that while I'm sleeping. Also, there is a curtain where I need. It can block the sunshine, I can take a deep sleep.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for taking the time to answer your homework today, Elic. I liked your composition today, you've expressed yourself well using complete sentences with complete thoughts. Please review my corrections carefully, and then try to take notes of the corrections which you have noticed from them. Again, thank you and have a great day ahead! :)


I don't need to have nothing else to make good mood during sleep.
>> I don't need to have anything else to have a good mood before going to bed.
I need to only long pillow.
>> I only need a long pillow.
Because I hug that while I'm sleeping.
>> Correct. OR Because I snuggle it while I'm sleeping.
Also, there is a curtain where I need.
>> I also need curtains.
It can block the sunshine, I can take a deep sleep.
>> It can block the sunshine and helps me have a deep sleep.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120076 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 222
120075 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 183
120074 home work ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 356
120073 Where were am I at last month. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 431
120072 What will I do when I have an earache. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 519
120071  For you, what is the most difficult part of English?... ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 866
120070 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 2
120069 the first homework(if i had more freetime) ÀÌ*¸í ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 1
120068 Call ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 2
120067 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 0
120066 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 2
120065 homework À±*¿ø ÁøÇàÁß 2022-06-22 270
120064 Do you agree that dogs are man\'s best friend? Explain your... ÀÌ* ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 439
120063 Spociness is taste, not pain ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 224
120062 Do you think getting old is a good thing or a bad thing? Explain... ÀÌ* ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 307
120061 What has been the hardest thing to get used to? ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 75
120060 Some people think that facing challenges improves a person. Do... ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 1
120059 Where do you always eat out? Can you please describe the place? ÇÑ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 5
120058 What is your hatest food and why? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 171
120057 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-21 170

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04