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영작교정 게시판

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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

9/13 homework

작성자: 윤*현
2022-09-14 1305

회원님의 영작문

I hope to meet school friends whom I lose contact with during a school reunion.
One of them is my elementary school freind.
I met her first at the Kindergarten, and she was my classmates until 4th grade of elementary school.
She lived in the neighborhood, so we went to school together.
After we came back from the school, we played together.
We also shared many secrets.
Unfortunately, as I moved to other place and transferred to other elementary school, I wasn't able to sent time with her.
Because I didn't have mobile phone and widely use E-mail at that time, I coudn't easily contact with her, but I exchanged letters with her.
I lost contact with her as time went by.
I often think of her and wonder about what she is doing and how she looks.
If I have a chance to meet her, I will very happy.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Dr. Stella!

Our first best friends are those we spent time with when we were still very young. Since we made early memories with them, it's difficult to forget our fun childhood activities and how they enriched our experiences. Anyway, I hope that you will have the chance to see her again someday and reckon the good old days.

Meanwhile, here on your homework, you have executed your message well by having a very good flow of thought by organizing your ideas smoothly. Also, minute grammar suggestions were made below. 

Continue writing because it's one of your best skills in English. See you later!

-T. Donna~ 

I hope to meet school friends whom I lose contact with during a school reunion.
>> Correct!

One of them is my elementary school freind.
>> Correct!
Or: friend

I met her first at the Kindergarten, and she was my classmates until 4th grade of elementary school.
>> I met her first at the kindergarten, and she was my classmate until the 4th grade of the elementary school.

She lived in the neighborhood, so we went to school together.
>> Correct!

After we came back from the school, we played together.
>> After we came back from school, we played together.

We also shared many secrets.
>> Correct!

Unfortunately, as I moved to other place and transferred to other elementary school, I wasn't able to sent time with her.
>> Unfortunately, as I moved to another place and transferred to another elementary school, I wasn't able to spend time with her.

Because I didn't have mobile phone and widely use E-mail at that time, I coudn't easily contact with her, but I exchanged letters with her.
>> Because I didn't have a mobile phone and widely used e-mail at that time, I coudn't easily contact her, but I exchanged letters (with her/ instead).

I lost contact with her as time went by.
>> Correct!

I often think of her and wonder about what she is doing and how she looks.
>> I often think of her and wonder about what she is doing and how she looks like.

If I have a chance to meet her, I will very happy.
>> If I have a chance to meet her, I will be very happy.

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