¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework ◡̈

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*Çö
2022-09-05 1226

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Title: My Most Unforgettable Childhood Memory

The unforgettable memories of childhood are divided into two types. Good memories or Bad memories.
Actually, Bad memories are memorable more than good memories.
When I was elementary school student, I met a friend who has worst personality.
I and she are close friend. but I had been attacked my mind because of her.
So so some of my childhood is worst unforgetten memory.
I don't know whether she is living well, honestly I don't want her lives are well that though.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there Emma! You did great with this topic. You were able to express yourself in complete thoughts. Each sentence you've created are understandable and clear. Please review my corrections, especially the additional words I've included. :)


The unforgettable memories of childhood are divided into two types. Good memories or Bad memories.
>> The unforgettable memories of my childhood are divided into two types, the good memories and bad memories.
Actually, Bad memories are memorable more than good memories.
>> Actually, bad memories are more memorable than the good ones.
When I was elementary school student, I met a friend who has worst personality.
>> When I was an elementary school student, I met a friend who has the worst personality.
I and she are close friend. but I had been attacked my mind because of her.
>> We were close friends, but I had unpleasant thoughts because of her.
So so some of my childhood is worst unforgetten memory.
>> That's why some of my childhood memories are worst and unforgettable.
I don't know whether she is living well, honestly I don't want her lives are well that though.
>> I don't know whether she is living well, honestly I don't want her to live well.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124919 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 1
124918 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 625
124917 What can always put you in a better mood after a bad day? ¼Û*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 2
124916 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 733
124915 What is your dream home? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 897
124914 Where do you see yourself 5 to 10 years from now? What are your... ¼Û*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 2
124913 Answer : What would you do if you became the richest person on... Á¤*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 806
124912 The reson there is not difference in big city and small town. ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 1
124911 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 0
124910 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 0
124909 Monday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 1531
124908 Homework ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 1
124907 My Favorite Music ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 1232
124906 According to the article, many working parents, especially... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 867
124905 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 0
124904 Write something interesting about your day. ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 987
124903 Asking ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 1
124902 license ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 921
124901 My favorite childhood memories that I remember ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 907
124900 What is your opinion about a four-day week? Àå*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 755

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04