¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why do we have to protect the Earth?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼Õ*¸²
2022-09-05 1604

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®



I sent it for photo!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Hanah! :)
Thank you for sending your essay here. I have already checked it and I hope this becomes really helpful for you. 
See you in class later! :)
~Teacher Charry

Hello, my name is Hyerim Som. 

We inhabit the Earth but we often forget the importance of water, air and nature.
As if the environment is just an object designed for human consumption in order for them to live well. 
But recently, many people have shown concern and protected the Earth. 
In your opinion, why do people behave this way? 

First, many marine animals are suffering because of our waste products. 
Have you by chance seen a turtle dying from ingesting plastic rubbish? It mistook the trash for food. 
If you keep carelessly throwing away your trashes, more creatures will suffer. 

Second, the Earth continues to get warmer and warmer because of the Green House effect. 
If we generate a lot of green house  gases, it can destroy the ozone layer and can cause the Earth to become warmer. 
Sadly, due to global warming, animals like polar bears are losing their homes. 

Lastly, floods and droughts are getting worse because of the ruthless logging. 
Trees are important because when it rains a lot, their roots absorb the water and when the soil is too dry, it supplies water to the ground. 
But people logged trees so the number of trees that can store and supply water has decreased. 
So nowadays, we experience a lot of floods and droughts in the world. 

Animals and plants continue to become endangered and extinct due to pollution, global warming, and natural disasters such as floods and droughts. 
We also have to think of the Earth's welfare and not just focus on ours. 

Thank you for listening to my speech. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117335 Do young people use their cell phones too much? Do you think... Àü*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 693
117334 Do you agree that changes in the business and economic sector... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 208
117333 Give me one big mistake that you have done and what lesson have... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 680
117332 Exciting experience ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 723
117331 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 422
117330 What fruits do you like to most? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 142
117329 What are the signs of aging that you feel at this point in your... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 3
117328 How many children do you want and why? Share your answer in a... ³ë*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 1
117327 What springs to mind when you hear the term ¡®junk food¡¯? - How... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 343
117326 What was the best help you have received? ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 683
117325 If you were a dinosaur, which one would you be? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 205
117324 If you could change your name would you? What would it be? Why... ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 187
117323 What kind of music ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 0
117322 How can you contribute? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 348
117321 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 1248
117320 Choose any of these sentences to complete with correct... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 180
117319 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 6
117318 What kind of medicine would you like to be discovered/invented? ½Å*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 491
117317 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 0
117316 Ice cream ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-14 705

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04