¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

8/31

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2022-09-01 1848

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What is the best characteristic of the city?

Cities are good for living because of many convenient facilities.
I can go department store easily and get a variety of items.
Also, when I am ill, I find hospitals and pharmacies regardless of where I am.
Museum, theaters and facilities for activities are more accessible, and I could enjoy new movies and exercise.
I like to eat out and I'm interested in finding fancy restaurants.
In cities, especially Seoul, there are so many famous restaurants which rank high between customers.
There are so many transportations to be used like trains, buses and taxes.
People are able to go anywhere in the cities taking transportations.
Sometimes, I'm tired of crowded people, pollutions and busy life in cities, but I love to live in Seoul because of these convenience and entertainments.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Dr. Stella!

The city equals all the conveniences life could offer. What can we not do in the city? All we need is money and time to experience everything we desire to access.

Your composition is solidly cohesive and compact with information, examples, and it had a great execution. The suggestions I places are some correct forms of words. See the underlined ones below. Being mindful of the correct word form adds more sophistication and accuracy to your composition. By itself, it had a strong introduction, body, and a smooth conclusion. Excellent job!

See you in class soon!

-T. Donna~

Cities are good for living because of many convenient facilities.
>> Correct!

I can go department store easily and get a variety of items.
>> I can go to the department store easily and get a variety of items.

Also, when I am ill, I find hospitals and pharmacies regardless of where I am.
>> Correct!

Museum, theaters and facilities for activities are more accessible, and I could enjoy new movies and exercise.
>> Correct!

I like to eat out and I'm interested in finding fancy restaurants.
>> Correct!

In cities, especially Seoul, there are so many famous restaurants which rank high between customers.
>> In cities, especially Seoul, there are so many famous restaurants which rank high among customers.

There are so many transportations to be used like trains, buses and taxes.
>> There are so many transportations to be used like trains, buses and taxis.

People are able to go anywhere in the cities taking transportations.
>> Correct!

Sometimes, I'm tired of crowded people, pollutions and busy life in cities, but I love to live in Seoul because of these convenience and entertainments.
>> Sometimes, I'm tired of crowded people, pollutions,  and busy life in cities, but I love to live in Seoul because of these conveniences and entertainments.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125634 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 3
125633 What is on your bucket list? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 690
125632 Apology ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 3
125631 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 762
125630 Sorry, teacher~ ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 0
125629 Being a photographer¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 698
125628 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 2
125627 In your opinion, do miracles still happen? Why or why not? ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 817
125626 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 1015
125625 Homework ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 846
125624 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 0
125623 What kind of information are you comfortable releasing to the... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 1025
125622 What do you picture yourself doing 10 years from now? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 654
125621 Homework ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 1
125620 What is your favorite all-time game? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 818
125619 Has China sent spy balloons to your country? Share your answer... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 3
125618 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 0
125617 Best memory in the sky ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 2
125616 Have gun at home is very dangerous. ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 654
125615 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-14 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04