¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

8/31

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2022-09-01 1523

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What is the best characteristic of the city?

Cities are good for living because of many convenient facilities.
I can go department store easily and get a variety of items.
Also, when I am ill, I find hospitals and pharmacies regardless of where I am.
Museum, theaters and facilities for activities are more accessible, and I could enjoy new movies and exercise.
I like to eat out and I'm interested in finding fancy restaurants.
In cities, especially Seoul, there are so many famous restaurants which rank high between customers.
There are so many transportations to be used like trains, buses and taxes.
People are able to go anywhere in the cities taking transportations.
Sometimes, I'm tired of crowded people, pollutions and busy life in cities, but I love to live in Seoul because of these convenience and entertainments.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Dr. Stella!

The city equals all the conveniences life could offer. What can we not do in the city? All we need is money and time to experience everything we desire to access.

Your composition is solidly cohesive and compact with information, examples, and it had a great execution. The suggestions I places are some correct forms of words. See the underlined ones below. Being mindful of the correct word form adds more sophistication and accuracy to your composition. By itself, it had a strong introduction, body, and a smooth conclusion. Excellent job!

See you in class soon!

-T. Donna~

Cities are good for living because of many convenient facilities.
>> Correct!

I can go department store easily and get a variety of items.
>> I can go to the department store easily and get a variety of items.

Also, when I am ill, I find hospitals and pharmacies regardless of where I am.
>> Correct!

Museum, theaters and facilities for activities are more accessible, and I could enjoy new movies and exercise.
>> Correct!

I like to eat out and I'm interested in finding fancy restaurants.
>> Correct!

In cities, especially Seoul, there are so many famous restaurants which rank high between customers.
>> In cities, especially Seoul, there are so many famous restaurants which rank high among customers.

There are so many transportations to be used like trains, buses and taxes.
>> There are so many transportations to be used like trains, buses and taxis.

People are able to go anywhere in the cities taking transportations.
>> Correct!

Sometimes, I'm tired of crowded people, pollutions and busy life in cities, but I love to live in Seoul because of these convenience and entertainments.
>> Sometimes, I'm tired of crowded people, pollutions,  and busy life in cities, but I love to live in Seoul because of these conveniences and entertainments.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122077 Talk about the movie/TV show you last saw. ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-01 833
122076 Hi Gemmar ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-01 759
122075 Becoming good Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-01 1085
122074 My business ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-01 2
122073 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-01 1
122072 Caleb\'s homework for 31 Aug 2022. ±Ç*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-01 1101
122071 Zumba ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-01 1174
122070 Do you worry about calories and fat content when you eat out? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-01 1
122069 Is aging more difficult for men or women? Why? ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-01 1086
122068 Which is longer, KTX or subway? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-01 3
122067 How can art be a part of culture? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-01 2127
122066 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-01 1046
122065 8/31 À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-09-01 1523
122064 How I overcome fear. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-08-31 828
122063 What¡¯s my opinion of myself? ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-08-31 2243
122062 8/31 HOMEWORK(11:20:15~11:21:7) ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-31 1008
122061 Do you think people who exercise are happier than those who... Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-08-31 1397
122060 homework ¹Ú*Çü ¿Ï·á 2022-08-31 1445
122059 confident ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-31 1409
122058 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-31 1151

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04