¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What disease frightens you the most? Why? What do you do to stay healthy?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-08-31 1185

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Whenever I have a symptom which lasts for more than a week, I always worry if It is a cancer. I don't know why it comes up on my brain, I guess that it is the most serious and frightened disease that I know. Although, it's cure rate has been increasing, there are still a lot of people who die due to a cancer. The incidence rate of cancer has been increasing due to the bad diet and the improvement of disgnostic technologies. I am scared if I have a cancer and it is impossible to control pain, I would like to be killed because the pain is horrible that patients can't endure without pain killer. I am not sure if I can manage my health mentally and physically. There are uncountable information to keep our health. We have seen it on TV, news papers and so on. However, it is nealy possible to keep right habits even thought, we know what we have to eat, drink and do. Eating healthy food, doing exercise regulary and avoiding unhealthy drinks like alchool is the way to stay healthy,.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

Whenever I have a symptom which lasts for more than a week, I always worry if It is a cancer. 
>> CORRECT! 
I don't know why it comes up on my brain, I guess that it is the most serious and frightened disease that I know. 
>> I don't know why it comes up on my brain, I guess that it is the most serious and frightening disease that I know. 
Although, it's cure rate has been increasing, there are still a lot of people who die due to a cancer. 
>> Although, its cure rate has been increasing, there are still a lot of people who die due to cancer. 
OR >> Although, its treatment rate has been increasing, there are still a lot of people who die due to cancer. 
The incidence rate of cancer has been increasing due to the bad diet and the improvement of disgnostic technologies. 
>> The incidence rate of cancer has been increasing due to  bad diet and the improvement of diagnostic technologies.
I am scared if I have a cancer and it is impossible to control pain, I would like to be killed because the pain is horrible that patients can't endure without pain killer. 
>> I am scared if I have a cancer and it is impossible to control pain, I would like to be killed because the pain is horrible that patients can't endure without any pain killer. 
I am not sure if I can manage my health mentally and physically. 
>> CORRECT! 
There are uncountable information to keep our health. 
>> CORRECT! 
We have seen it on TV, news papers and so on. 
>> CORRECT! 
However, it is nealy possible to keep right habits even thought, we know what we have to eat, drink and do.
>> However, it is nearly possible to keep right habits even thought, we know what we have to eat, drink and do.
 Eating healthy food, doing exercise regulary and avoiding unhealthy drinks like alchool is the way to stay healthy.
>> CORRECT! 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120763 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 404
120762 Homework for 07.14.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 1
120761 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 4
120760 Name one skill or hobby that you\'d like to learn. ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 215
120759 If you had to lose one sense, which would it be? Why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 225
120758 About the divorce.!! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 343
120757 What is something you hate doing when you get home? ±è*°â ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 312
120756 If you had to lose one sense, which would it be? Why? ÃÖ*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 289
120755 What is the most common kind of crime in South Korea? What... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 308
120754 What are the advantages of eating fast food? ä*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 236
120753 What is the best way to overcome stress? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 276
120752 What do you think are the pros and cons of eating out? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 492
120751 Thursday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 773
120750 What is the most difficult interview question that you answered? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 3
120749 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 216
120748 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 1
120747 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 250
120746 What do you do to look after your skin? Do you like the color of... ÃÖ*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 289
120745 My daughter ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 1
120744 Homework ÀÌ*¸í ¿Ï·á 2022-07-14 547

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04